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I Am Interested In Ethics

Shallowness has become one of our highest cultural values, to the point where practicing it earns you social acceptance - and anyone who dares to defy that value - with depth or length or complexity of thought or opinion - is made to pay a price.

It's wrong - but most people's sense of right and wrong is born mostly out of what their society [i]says[/i] is right and wrong. That's why things like slavery and Hitler were able to be accepted by the vast majority of the people in the countries where they've happened - because our ability to edit and ignore our conscience based on societal norms is nearly limitless. Slavery alone is proof of that - dozens of decades during which such obvious evil was done, again and again, in full view of everyone. Hitler hid things - he wove a pretty picture over the ugliness that was being done. But slavery was right there, right out in the open, for all to see. Anyone with a lick of conscience - of human decency - would have seen that it was wrong. But in the contest between personal conscience and cultural norms, the former will always be bludgeoned down by the latter, until the former [i]becomes[/i] the latter, to the point where we start to believe that the opinions, no matter how unconscionable they are - were always our own.

At the end of the day, we all value doing the right thing, and being happy, and not enslaving people, and a million other things - but nearly all of those things fall lower on our value system than the value of fitting in. Of looking and acting and speaking and thinking enough like the rest of the herd that we're able to ensure and secure our place among their ranks. And we'll ignore and ostracize and argue against anything and everything - from bigotry to compassion to slavery to emancipation to mercy: we'll rail against it all - or rail against nothing, if railing is out of vogue this decade - and all for the sake of securing our place in the ranks of the pack.

And the most twisted part of it is that most of us don't even realize that we're doing it. In most of our minds, we're fighting for [i]our[/i] values. Or we're not even fighting at all - we're just living. Just going to work and going to play and going to bed and spinning our cycles round and round as we tick our days away. But the truth is that vast swaths of the cycles of our days are born out of norms - society says that we should work 9 to 5, Monday through Friday, regardless of our situation or the size of our family or the cost of living. Society says that we should kill any and all creatures that are even slightly inconvenient to us, without an ounce of hesitation or regret, and without thought as to whether it's necessary. Society says that if this leader becomes that leader, or this party becomes that party, or this God becomes that god, or lack thereof - then all of the problems will go away. Maybe it's true. Maybe it's not. But what I'm talking about has nothing to do with those particular potential problems. It's about how we [i]approach[/i] those problems.

How we approach them is simple: society says that we should work this kind of schedule, so let's do it and never question it. Lets add expenses to our lives until they match the income that society told us to achieve. Society says that the word "pest" means that lives no longer have value, so let's kill without regret. Society - around here anyway - says that this is the right God, and that this is the right kind of politics - so let's live within those lines and fight for them, and against the other side.

That's the limit of the personal history and the ethical development of most of our beliefs. That's as far as most of us go. It's as high as most of us climb on the ethical ladder.

This description isn't complete, because no description of human beings ever is. We're too complicated for that. In particular, it leaves out the idea of the ethical development of groups, and how that can drive the ethical development of their members even if their members never stop being sheep.

At the end of the day, it's only by taking a hundred passes through ourselves, from a hundred different angles, that we can even begin to understand ourselves. This is a piece of our puzzle - one that I believe is true, both in my mind and in my gut. But it's not complete.
SW-User
I agree with this, but I'd say it goes further than just caring about not fitting in. In our heart of hearts, we want to be and feel comfortable, safe, not put out in any way. We are selfish and put our own desires before what is morally and ethically right and then we twist it into pretty little lies so we don't have to see the truth.
SW-User
@gol979 I understand your sadness at what they said and I used to share it. In many ways, I still do. However, I have learned that there is such a thing as being too selfless. Or perhaps, another way of looking at it is that by exalting the attempt to be selfless, one can actually be selfish.

What I mean by that is, sometimes boundaries need to be made with others. They will perceive that action as selfish. In fact, it often IS an act of self - preservation. However, NOT creating proper boundaries in relationships is actually what is selfish. It allows the other person to continue in patterns that are not beneficial to them or to others. Yet, for the sake of appearing selfless, we often allow it to continue.

So, I think when some people say we can be too selfless, they are talking about instances where we choose not to make boundaries, and end up someone's doormat. Really, that's a selfish act. We don't want the conflict and so we let it go on.
gol979 · 41-45, M
@SW-User I get that......but that's just a scenario. You can have other scenarios when being selfless is beneficial to everyone
SW-User
@gol979 Yes, absolutely.
gol979 · 41-45, M
Good post 👍
We are the stories we tell ourselves......and those stories are so self centred and cannot ever lead to genuine fulfilment.
Time to change the book. I may add that there are very good narratives out there but you just have to wade through the swamp of materialism and atomisation
BlueDiver · 36-40, M
@gol979 Thanks :)

 
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