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I Am In Recovery

The reason I've been away from SW for a while is because I've been on a bender for a very long time. I tried to dry out and went into the DT's . I almost died. I had seizures, hallucinations, severe anxiety, and my blood pressure was 180 over 120. It was 15 hours of pure hell, and several days of unbelievable discomfort and anxiety. I'm dry now. If I don't stay that way, I'm going to die.

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pennynoodles · 56-60, F

It's good to hear that you survived this. The thought of heading back there might be enough to put you off being there again. Best wishes for your recovery.

puck61

@pennynoodles Thank you. I have wept more in the last 5 days, than I ever have in my life. My emotions are red lined.

pennynoodles · 56-60, F

Write a diary of your journey and thoughts....you may find it therapeutic. @puck61

puck61

@pennynoodles Yes! That's what I did the last 7 times.

pennynoodles · 56-60, F

You must have quite a stack of diaries then! @puck61

puck61

@pennynoodles I never keep much of anything for very long. I just always did "journaling" because that's what they told us to do in rehab and halfway houses. This has to be the last time. It doesn't matter how long I stay sober, when I pick back up, I am either the same or worse than when I stopped, so I'm out of relapses now.

pennynoodles · 56-60, F

I think you've been given the final warning this time. I hope you have the strength to do this. @puck61