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Why do people say a person will change their mind or regret their decision not to have kids?

I’m just saying, I’ve seen plenty of people who are happy and don’t regret their decision to not have kids. Just because you want kids or regretted your decision, that doesn’t mean everyone will. Now stop telling people they will change their mind or regret it. It’s just disrespectful. I feel like you’re basically telling them that they’re so stupid that they can’t form their own views and opinion and only your way is the right way. You’re talking down to them about a personal choice that doesn’t effect you.

Doomflower · 36-40, M
I'd rather regret not having kids than regret having them.

There is a great Facebook page called "I regret having children" and parents post there all the time about how they wish they'd thought through the implications of having a kid because now they have no life, feel worn down all the time, miss their friends, miss travel, miss quiet time, etc.

I got fixed about 4 years ago. Never regretted it for a second. Yeah there were a few moments right after where I was like, "what have I done!? This is way more serious than a tattoo!" but never wished I had done differently.

Lots of reasons for the decision but a BIG one was the anti choice tide I saw rising. In the last few weeks I have been joyful every day that I will never be forced to carry a pregnancy to term.
SW-User
I never wanted kids, don't have them, no regrets about that at all! My sister had them...I visit, go home and leave them there!
SW-User
@SW-User Me too!
Doomflower · 36-40, M
@SW-User it's kinda selfish but I hope my sister has kids so I can teach thrm cool things, spoil them, and give them back. "I taught them how to make fidgit spinners out of construction paper and. . . also you have a new puppy"
SW-User
@Doomflower nah, not selfish. You have to do what's right for you!
Wiseacre · F
I've never said that to anybody... children are a huge life change, and not everybody is cut out for it...so, enjoy ur child free life..less stress!
TripHazard · 31-35, M
Not having kids seems like the smart thing to do to me. Most folks are dropping em out left right n centre, it’s gross
SW-User
Because they think it's a "one size fits all" world and they are only comfortable if their way is the right way.
I am 47 and never had kids. I have NO regrets.
SW-User
People who decide not to have kids, should be rewarded. Those who judge their decision, need their heads checked.
Tminus6453 · M
Everyone ive ever known that didnt want kids at 19 still at my age didnt and dont want kids..no regrets
katielass · F
I've never had any regrets. Everyone said I would but I haven't.
unknownpoetx · 36-40, M
you definitely shouldn't have kids for the sake of humanity
EnigmaticGeek · 61-69, M
I don't have a problem with anyone choosing to not have kids if they don't want kids, nor do I have a problem with anyone choosing to have kids if they do want them. I still want kids of my own.

I do have a problem with people who don't want kids actually having them, not putting them up for adoption, and then neglecting them, abusing them, and even killing them.
When asked my opinion, I have never been disrespectful. I have told my friends that it is no big deal if they do or don't. When it came down to being younger and making that decision AND getting sterilized, I would be a bit more willing to talk to them about it. Mostly, I've just said don't make that decision permanent until later. Reasons, well I think people should have the option to change their mind. Example: My cousin was set to have a vasectomy after having 1 child. He was in his mid twenties, and didn't stay with his baby mama. Wasn't in love with her, the pregnancy was a surprise. He didn't. Much later he did meet the woman he finally loved and she told him that kids were important to her and she was going to have them. Had he had a vasectomy, that would have been a deal breaker for her.
I think there is probably something deep inside us, an instinct so to speak that at some level will make us second guess a decision not to have kids.
katielass · F
@Subsumedpat sometimes you'd never know it. lol
@katielass yea more in keeping with a woman though I guess but we don't get to decide these things.
katielass · F
@Subsumedpat so true. :)
cd1019 · 41-45, M
Don't want kids, and have no regrets about not doing so.
SW-User
you're correct.
I am not sure why people do that 🤔
polyandrym66 · 70-79, M
My first wife and I never had kids. She was an elementary school teacher and we got our fill by association her pupil's and their parents..
We were very happy about NOT having kids..
in10RjFox · M
I normally do that for those who claim that they are asexuals. But kids .. its individual decision... But they should not marry and deprive their partner of a child... for the real purpose of marriage is to have children.
in10RjFox · M
@MorbidCynic why marriage for that when it's just a one-off transaction/ deal ?
But it started as a title-deed for cattle/land.. as women too were considered cattle .. and essentially a marriage was a title deed to say who the owner is .. But as population matured, it became a system to recognise families, where individuals were not considered a family.
I’m just letting you know what marriage originally was. Don’t ask me, ask history 😂 women were only viewed as imprortant for breeding and homemaking purposes. They were not valued as individuals but like an object or dairy cow. So who gives a fuck about marriage? It’s barbaric practice. Marriage has changed throughout time. People now marry for love and commitment, hence why gays can marry as well. @in10RjFox
in10RjFox · M
@MorbidCynic totally agree. Its a stupid practise infused into mankind. They tried it with animals .. it never worked ..😀😀

Families too must be formed like businesses and companies..Corporate families.. and the practise of individuals marrying one another must be scrapped.
IWasCallingYaLarry · 26-30, M
I agree. Like when I tell people I don't want kids, they tell me that I say that now but that I'll change my mind later in life. Lol, I will not.
OceanGuy33 · 51-55, M
I think the logic behind that statement is that when people reach the end of their lives they tend regret the things they DIDN’T do more than the things they DID.
DrSunnyTheSkeptic · 26-30, M
Raising kids is like losing weight. You want the result but dont want to do the work to get there.
SW-User
I haven't changed my mind. Bitches think they know the inside of my head better than me.
SW-User
I know, I will regret but I would still not going to have kids.
jeancolby · 31-35, F
I don't want kids.
EnigmaticGeek · 61-69, M
🤔 I can think of quite a few people for whom I regret that they had kids. 🙄

 
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