I Wonder Why Solitude Is Not Appreciated More
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I Wonder Why Solitude Is Not Appreciated More

"The capacity to be alone is the capacity to love. It may look paradoxical to you, but it is not. It is an existential truth: only those people who are capable of being alone are capable of love, of sharing, of going into the deepest core of the other person—without possessing the other, without becoming dependent on the other, without reducing the other to a thing, and without becoming addicted to the other" ~ Osho
GypsyMiss
46-50, F
25 replies 160 views Nov 1, 2017
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WonderGirl
I was a man who thrived on solitude; without it I was like another man without food or water. Each day without solitude weakened me. I took no pride in my solitude, but I was dependent on it. The darkness of the room was like sunlight to me.
Charles Bukowski
+ 3 · Reply · Translate · Apr 2, 2024
MrFinch · 61-69, M
I appreciate those sentiments. I was alone for years and learned to enjoy the freedom of not having to negotiate with or conform to someone else's wishes as you always do when there is a partner to consider. But I wonder if that made me a more selfish person?
Within a relationship it is no bad thing to have "alone" time when you can focus on your own interests, pursue things that only you enjoy and be apart so that coming back together can be all the sweeter.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Feb 24, 2024 · Edited: 10 mths ago
GypsyMiss · 46-50, F
@MrFinch I don't think it's selfish. My experience has been that I am a much nicer person to be around after having my own downtime and I have more to give. Keep me chained to you with little or no reprieve and I will eventually run out of steam.
+ 2 · Reply · Translate · Feb 24, 2024
Ghostinthemachine · M
Fortunately I learned this at a young age
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Feb 29, 2024
JaggedLittlePill · 46-50, F
Interesting. I never knew loving another meant not being with them while you hide out alone.
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Nov 1, 2017 · Edited: 10 mths ago
GypsyMiss · 46-50, F
@JaggedLittlePill being able to love someone for who they are, not what they can give you is the height of true love. Another fabulous quote that sums it up by Thomas Merton:
"The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them"
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 1, 2017
MrFinch · 61-69, M
@GypsyMiss Great quote, great advice.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Feb 24, 2024
JaggedLittlePill · 46-50, F
@GypsyMiss You can keep offering flowery qutoes..but quotes mean nothing in the face of reality.

Life is about relationships with other people. Isolation is isolation. These quotes are bullshit . Don't live life by quote.

Yes. Loving yourself is important. You need not be alone to love yourself. You can love yourself while loving others. You can love others without loving yourself. It happens all the time. You do not have to have been alone in order to love another.

Letting others be themselves is a given. Lots of people have a problem with this. I don't need a quote to tell me.

@MrFinch did you happen to notice how old this post is and the last time anyome commemted on it? November 2017.
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Feb 24, 2024
JoanieNewHampshire · T
❤️🌸❤️🌺❤️ I never knew this thank you! I love alone time and I love being with people. I'm also quite deep.
+ 2 · Reply · Translate · Nov 1, 2017
JoanieNewHampshire · T
@GypsyMiss so true! I love not needing. It means I'm free to make my choices and one of them is Dee with all herself stuff
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 1, 2017
GypsyMiss · 46-50, F
It sounds as though you have a very healthy relationship 🙂
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 1, 2017
JoanieNewHampshire · T
Like any relationship it has it's ups and downs 🌸 We are older and have experiences and have made choices. Complaints that I don't ____ or you don't ____ only cause more complaints. I think being greatful helps each other see each other and the world in a more peaceful and confident state. @GypsyMiss
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 1, 2017
ButtercupBabe · 41-45
Well said!
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 1, 2017
ButtercupBabe · 41-45
Indeed. We should get naked sometime and drink tea
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Nov 1, 2017
GypsyMiss · 46-50, F
@ButtercupBabe Anytime! 🙃
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Nov 1, 2017
ButtercupBabe · 41-45
MMMwwhha
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 1, 2017
Lochlee · 56-60, F
Beautiful. Thanks
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 1, 2017
RosaDawn · 46-50, F
Well its true. Nice post!
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 16, 2017
SW-User
So very true.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 1, 2017
Vetrov · 61-69, M
I’m happiest when alone.

Because silence is golden.




























.....told you so.
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Nov 18, 2017
PhoenixPhail · M
That's so true - very profound.
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Sep 30, 2020
 
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