My therapist asked me to get assessed for autism
Life is so frustrating. I have 2 post-grad degrees, I was the top in the country in one of them. My clients love me. I love my job. (I'm literally working without pay at the moment because the thought of being at home haunts me, and I love every second of work).
THE ONLY THING THAT WEIGHS ME DOWN IS MY SOCIAL SKILLS. I lose all credibility once I open my mouth. My brain goes blank and I SAY AND DO STUPID THINGS. Despite ALL OF MY ACCOMPLISHMENTS, I just DO NOT DO WELL WITH COLLEAGUES.
With clients, you have a script. You have answers to all their questions because it's all technical, it's stuff I have learnt academically.
But colleagues and bosses, they just intimidate me so much.
This is also why I am NOT a good leader. I'm such a stupid people pleaser that I feel like I'm stepping on toes every time I say or ask something or delegate a task.
This is also why I'm scared I won't do well in interviews, because I get such massive brain fog when I see people looking at me 😭 buttt I really need the job.
Uggghhhhh.
THE ONLY THING THAT WEIGHS ME DOWN IS MY SOCIAL SKILLS. I lose all credibility once I open my mouth. My brain goes blank and I SAY AND DO STUPID THINGS. Despite ALL OF MY ACCOMPLISHMENTS, I just DO NOT DO WELL WITH COLLEAGUES.
With clients, you have a script. You have answers to all their questions because it's all technical, it's stuff I have learnt academically.
But colleagues and bosses, they just intimidate me so much.
This is also why I am NOT a good leader. I'm such a stupid people pleaser that I feel like I'm stepping on toes every time I say or ask something or delegate a task.
This is also why I'm scared I won't do well in interviews, because I get such massive brain fog when I see people looking at me 😭 buttt I really need the job.
Uggghhhhh.
31-35, F
