I just....can never stop thinking about conversations that I have with people. I hate itttt. I usually hate what I end up saying.

I regret most conversations I have. :( For eg, today one of my senior colleagues asked me about my long terms plans: whether I want to stay in this country or go back afterwards. I told him I've just been here a couple weeks, let me settle in, it will take me a while to make that decision. I told him that lifestyle here is drastically different to what I'm used to back home, and I'm still finding it a bit overwhelming. I will adjust, and if I adjust well, then I will plan to stay. If I feel this isn't for me, I'll go back.

I feel like my responses to questions come off as if I lack confidence in myself. I just don't like to have a big mouth, or have too many expectations of how life is going to turn out. I want to be a realist, so that if things don't work out, I can cope with them.

Now I'm cringing thinking about how I replied. :( I should have just kept it short and said "yes".