I remember one time I got on a bus.
The driver was normal. He just checked my pass and let me go. But I turned toward the isle and I immediately realized something was off. I couldn't really pinpoint it but something about the air on this bus was just off.
So I walked down the isle until I finally saw a place to sit. It was the back of the bus. And this guy was staring at me. Like, the whole time, when I walked up, his eyes were just glued to me. I didn't have any choice but to sit there. There was nowhere else to sit... So I just stood up the whole way.
He kept looking at me and said, "Where you headin?" This dude was so creepy that I lied to him. I told him somewhere I wasn't going. The whole trip, he kept asking me things like, "Whatchu doin all the way up there? Why you traveling 10 miles with a 9.75 mile ticket? You got a baby momma you gotta pay up to? You lucky I don't kick you off this bus, boy. I'm doing you a favor by just not beating yo ass." I wasn't even answering these questions, he was just asking them.
Finally, the bus stopped and I got off. I started walking to my attorney's office and then I realized... That damn bus dropped me off at the wrong location. I was about 13 miles from where I was supposed to be. No way I was gonna be on time.
Then I remembered... you know what, it WAS kinda strange that weirdo was all the way in the back of the bus but he had a steering wheel in his hand.
It occurred to me that I was drunk, got the back of the bus mixed up with the front, and that weirdo asking me all those questions was actually the bus driver doing me a favor by dropping me off near the destination I told him when my ticket was for 9 miles.
I'll have to make it up to him because I may or may not have preemptively took my revenge by pissing on the bus before I got off. 😐
So I walked down the isle until I finally saw a place to sit. It was the back of the bus. And this guy was staring at me. Like, the whole time, when I walked up, his eyes were just glued to me. I didn't have any choice but to sit there. There was nowhere else to sit... So I just stood up the whole way.
He kept looking at me and said, "Where you headin?" This dude was so creepy that I lied to him. I told him somewhere I wasn't going. The whole trip, he kept asking me things like, "Whatchu doin all the way up there? Why you traveling 10 miles with a 9.75 mile ticket? You got a baby momma you gotta pay up to? You lucky I don't kick you off this bus, boy. I'm doing you a favor by just not beating yo ass." I wasn't even answering these questions, he was just asking them.
Finally, the bus stopped and I got off. I started walking to my attorney's office and then I realized... That damn bus dropped me off at the wrong location. I was about 13 miles from where I was supposed to be. No way I was gonna be on time.
Then I remembered... you know what, it WAS kinda strange that weirdo was all the way in the back of the bus but he had a steering wheel in his hand.
It occurred to me that I was drunk, got the back of the bus mixed up with the front, and that weirdo asking me all those questions was actually the bus driver doing me a favor by dropping me off near the destination I told him when my ticket was for 9 miles.
I'll have to make it up to him because I may or may not have preemptively took my revenge by pissing on the bus before I got off. 😐
26-30, M
