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I am in a very sad mood and feeling very hopeless today. Do you feel I messed up my undergrad?

This one is college related so I am gonna share the whole thing behind why I am too sad today. Now I am in my 4th year and 8th semester of college which is my last semester. In my school days, I was a quite good student and never failed in any exams. In my 1st year of college too, I was a good student and passed all my exams with good marks and grades. But things changed when I came to 3rd semester of 2nd year in 2019. I had my 3rd semester final exam back in end of December 2019 and it continued till Jan 2020 but I had failed in 4 subjects out of 6 subjects. The failed subjects are called backlogs. I was so scared that I didn't tell my parents at all at that time. We didn't have final exams in 4th semester because of covid pandemic so we were promoted without any exams to the next semester based on our previous years scores. In Feb 2021, I had my final exams of 5th semester of 3rd year and after that they gave us a chance of clear our 3rd semester backlogs but I kinda neglected it and didn't tell my parents about it and lied to them that I had some other exam until my dad called one of our teacher and he said him the truth and my parents were shocked and mom scolded me badly. So I couldn't clear my 3rd semester backlogs that time. But whats worse is I also failed in 3 subjects out of 6 subjects in 5th semester as well because the classes were online so I didn't understand anything. My mom was even more upset after that. Even in 6th semester also we didn't have final exam because covid cases were increasing in my city in mid 2021 so they promoted us without any exam like they did in 4th semester but this time they again gave a chance to clear our backlogs but again I only cleared 1 out of 3 backlogs of 5th semester and 1 out of 4 backlogs of 3rd semester, so I still had 5 backlogs to clear. After my 7th semester final exam got over in Feb 2022, I again wrote 2 of my 5th semester backlog exams in Feb end and then 3 of the 3rd semester backlogs just few days ago. But today 5th semester results came and I cleared 1 of the 2 subjects but I still have 1 backlog even now from 5th semester as I again failed in that another subject and today thats why I am full down. All these happened because of my negligence in studies and I am studying electronics engineering which is probably the hardest branch of engineering. I got addicted to my mobile phone(cellphone) always watching Instagram, Youtube, dating apps, this site, reddit etc and thats why I didn't take my studies seriously and ended up failing in them. I am feeling very hopeless after seeing I again failed in that subject because I am in my last semester now. I do have a chance to clear it after writing my 8th semester final exams but I am not able to face my mom. She has scolded me before saying she is very upset to have a son like me. I wrote my 3rd semester backlog exams good this time because my mom took away my phone when I was studying so I don't get distracted and I hope I will pass those 3 subjects this time. I am feeling like crying today. I messed up my undergrad. I also have dreams of studying and going to abroad but idk whether I can because of these backlogs.
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Just4Me · F
You can do it. You have proven that to yourself. You need to want sucess more than feeling good in the moment. If you suceed without other people's control over your life, you can proud of yourself.
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