I am more than Depressed...

My family would never understand what it was like for me when my mother kills herself. And never gave me the love I needed that was gone. When I witnessed my grandmothers horrible depression. When my Aunt hurt me everyday at home when I came home from school. I became that 1 child failure. When I was molested as a child and then as a teenager. When my biological Father beat me for being molested. When I was raped last year in my own apartment by a stranger. It's all already too late. I guess what is my excuse... besides trauma. No one ever cared. I kept everything to myself for a long time. I've been self harming my face everyday. No one knows what I've gone through. I'm officially hurt. I never deserved any of this...