When you help someone with major life problems
How long do you help them? I’ve been helping support a couple of families for two three years but don’t feel as if they are making progress on their own
Top | Newest First | Oldest First
I helped a family for 3 yrs
I rebuilt their home so HRS didn't take their grandkids
I let them stay in my home and supported them
The daughter kept getting busted selling drugs
the son for growing weed and making meth
the grandpa for fighting dogs and roosters
I was trying to save the kids from being taken away from the grandma ,,she killed herself looking after 4 kids ,taking care of the dogs
The daughter was busted first ,selling drugs to an undercover
Her kids were placed in her Moms custody ,she was not to be alone with them
But she was caught in a store with the kids alone (ran right into her case worker ,so they took the rest of them too)
While they were looking into her ,they seen the Grandpa had game cocks and bull dogs ,so they investigated him too
He went to prison ,,then they got the son
Grandma has lost it all ,the kids were adopted out ,
She looks for love on the internet
She has also abused drugs for years as well
She meets a man ,says she is in love
He was a carrier for Hep B
In 2 months time ,,she is dead
My kids help people too and they ask me "Dad ,when do we stop helping" and this is my new take on it
When you are not helping your enabling
When they won't help themselves ,then I don't need to either
when you don't care enough for your kids and grandkids to provide them a stable home ,,you don't deserve them
I did all that trying to keep those kids with their grandma they loved so much (and she loved them )
But now they have been adopted ,her man and both of her kids in prison ,and now she is dead
It is all so crazy ,I am still trying to wrap my mind around it ,,but the guy who bought the place got a nice house
We literally rebuilt it from the ground up
New floors ,and not to the wall we took it apart and rebuilt it
New wiring ,new insulation ,new plumbing ,new cabinets
hard wood paneling walls ,sheet rock ceilings
sinks ,tub ,toilet ,,everything new
floor coverings ,fixtures and lighting ,,it is basically a new home and I am disabled ,,the pain I was in doing all this
It was a wake up call
I am going to begin with prayer and fasting from now on
Not just jumping in to save someone who don't want to save themselves
But how fast she died .over her boyfriend having Hep B
She didn't even know she had a damaged liver ,she never went to the doctor ,she self medicated ,buying pain meds from family members
The entire family is like that ,,her brothers are the same way and have been the 30 yrs I have known them
In the end ,,I was not doing them kids any favors
They should have been in a better home long ago
before they were old enough to see all they have seen
If you are in year 3 ,,its time for a deadline
Help yourself ,,or I am quitting too
I rebuilt their home so HRS didn't take their grandkids
I let them stay in my home and supported them
The daughter kept getting busted selling drugs
the son for growing weed and making meth
the grandpa for fighting dogs and roosters
I was trying to save the kids from being taken away from the grandma ,,she killed herself looking after 4 kids ,taking care of the dogs
The daughter was busted first ,selling drugs to an undercover
Her kids were placed in her Moms custody ,she was not to be alone with them
But she was caught in a store with the kids alone (ran right into her case worker ,so they took the rest of them too)
While they were looking into her ,they seen the Grandpa had game cocks and bull dogs ,so they investigated him too
He went to prison ,,then they got the son
Grandma has lost it all ,the kids were adopted out ,
She looks for love on the internet
She has also abused drugs for years as well
She meets a man ,says she is in love
He was a carrier for Hep B
In 2 months time ,,she is dead
My kids help people too and they ask me "Dad ,when do we stop helping" and this is my new take on it
When you are not helping your enabling
When they won't help themselves ,then I don't need to either
when you don't care enough for your kids and grandkids to provide them a stable home ,,you don't deserve them
I did all that trying to keep those kids with their grandma they loved so much (and she loved them )
But now they have been adopted ,her man and both of her kids in prison ,and now she is dead
It is all so crazy ,I am still trying to wrap my mind around it ,,but the guy who bought the place got a nice house
We literally rebuilt it from the ground up
New floors ,and not to the wall we took it apart and rebuilt it
New wiring ,new insulation ,new plumbing ,new cabinets
hard wood paneling walls ,sheet rock ceilings
sinks ,tub ,toilet ,,everything new
floor coverings ,fixtures and lighting ,,it is basically a new home and I am disabled ,,the pain I was in doing all this
It was a wake up call
I am going to begin with prayer and fasting from now on
Not just jumping in to save someone who don't want to save themselves
But how fast she died .over her boyfriend having Hep B
She didn't even know she had a damaged liver ,she never went to the doctor ,she self medicated ,buying pain meds from family members
The entire family is like that ,,her brothers are the same way and have been the 30 yrs I have known them
In the end ,,I was not doing them kids any favors
They should have been in a better home long ago
before they were old enough to see all they have seen
If you are in year 3 ,,its time for a deadline
Help yourself ,,or I am quitting too
rckt148 · 61-69, M
I just noticed a notification you liked this response and I am not sure if I thanked you for the BA .
but I mainly wanted to ask if you are still helping them ?
I recently sent my Granddaughter packing ,,that was hard
But she is living with a boy that won't work ,who got the bright idea since her family loves her so much we would support him too .
His parents kicked him out ,he can't support himself and moves my granddaughter in ,,they said NO ,,but he has no respect for anyone
So we offered them a place to stay ,,I month later she is working ,he is not
He got a job but lost it ,they were working him to hard ,he needed a "personal day "
She was told she could save her money so they could get their own place
so they have a roof over their heads ,food ,transportation
Pretty boy thinks he is going to lay in the AC and play games all day and she works ,,
Well enough was enough ,,they were asked to help on the food they eat just to see if they had any money (since its clear he likes the living arrangement ,they had their own room ,a real bed and we allowed their pets .
and he thinks its unfair ,,"We agreed to let them save their money " except they haven't ,not a dime ,,he wanted to go out to eat ,take a trip back to Georgia to see his friends ,,,I told them to stay
And when she is tired of him ,,then she can come home
When she is tired of sleeping double on his friends couch's ,who party all night while she is trying to sleep ,,she will tire of it
I hope you have too
Sometimes ,love has to be tough 🤗
but I mainly wanted to ask if you are still helping them ?
I recently sent my Granddaughter packing ,,that was hard
But she is living with a boy that won't work ,who got the bright idea since her family loves her so much we would support him too .
His parents kicked him out ,he can't support himself and moves my granddaughter in ,,they said NO ,,but he has no respect for anyone
So we offered them a place to stay ,,I month later she is working ,he is not
He got a job but lost it ,they were working him to hard ,he needed a "personal day "
She was told she could save her money so they could get their own place
so they have a roof over their heads ,food ,transportation
Pretty boy thinks he is going to lay in the AC and play games all day and she works ,,
Well enough was enough ,,they were asked to help on the food they eat just to see if they had any money (since its clear he likes the living arrangement ,they had their own room ,a real bed and we allowed their pets .
and he thinks its unfair ,,"We agreed to let them save their money " except they haven't ,not a dime ,,he wanted to go out to eat ,take a trip back to Georgia to see his friends ,,,I told them to stay
And when she is tired of him ,,then she can come home
When she is tired of sleeping double on his friends couch's ,who party all night while she is trying to sleep ,,she will tire of it
I hope you have too
Sometimes ,love has to be tough 🤗
This comment is hidden.
Show Comment
valobasa4ever · F
No I never did that .
But regular basis I donate blood for those who dnt have medical insurance .
But regular basis I donate blood for those who dnt have medical insurance .
SW-User
things are complex. you and them folks only know what is really happening
Eddiesolds · 61-69, M
I've been helping a friend for about 5 years.Its hard to turn away
SW-User
You are enabling them then. Time to pull back..
valobasa4ever · F
