Update
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Update... A friend sent me some money and that was really helpful. I relaxed a bit.

They've accepted me to go and stay at a monastery and maybe I'll do that in a couple of days. I say maybe because it's like 500km from where I am.
I've made a series of drawings in the meantime that I put up for sale in affordable price this time and waiting to see what about it.
I keep on posting on my social media like crazy. Exactly the people I disliked before hahaha but now I have changed. Whoever finds me annoying can unfollow or mute me. I will just go on!
Ah. This is a tough time around. It won't be like that forever though and I'm grateful for the lessons. I got a ton of lessons.
If I go to the monastery, I think there I'll rest... And I'm planning afterwards to go to a natural park and camp for few days...:)
Eventually I want to settle somewhere and get myself together a bit. Just not yet.
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pancakeslam · 41-45, M
Oh yeah Vipassana retreats are usually free
elafina · 36-40, F
@pancakeslam this isn't a vipassana retreat but a monastery stay. Some people extend their stay and get into what's called an ordination. And if everything agrees they can get a long term visa and become monks/nuns.
But I'm only going for a week, follow their schedule and see how it feels. Waking up at 3 am, meditating and chanting. I'm so ready hehe:D