That "Dragon Phallus"" or "Sad Wizard Phallus" why did I hallucinate and why did my heart manifest desire I always withheld

For I thought and they were revealed? what does it mean? I ponder if the afterlife will bestow onto me the phallus, will I be in paradise with a gigantic phallus. Let's say it pertain to something like Excalibur being chosen and wishes being granted. I'm thinking so deep, maybe it was the devil tempting me. WHY DID I THINK, DESIRE and MANIFEST THIS. Surely it must point to an invisible hand mingling in this reality.