I Need to Rant
Has anyone else here dated anyone who didn't want to make it official?
I've been seeing a guy for about 9 months and I thought the main reason we weren't official was that he might be moving away, he isn't moving away anytime soon it turns out. He still doesn't want to put a label on things, and he does have good reasons that I won't share on here but I can't help but feel hurt. Recently I talked about my feelings with him (just before or after he found out he wasn't moving) and that I would want to progress and he said he would be open to giving it a try but then yesterday I bring it up again to make sure whether or not it was now official and he talked about how he doesn't like labels.
It feels like a stab in the stomach because I made it clear from the beginning I either wanted a platonic friendship OR a relationship and it seemed like he understood that. His feelings are important to me, and I don't want to pressure him into a relationship if he isn't ready to be in one...but I don't want to be just someone he is seeing and I am really confused at how he thinks not wanting a label would be any different from how we have been up until now.
I understand why he is unsure and I know it is hard on him too, but I can't take it anymore. I am considering just moving on. I feel so depressed I don't even want to go out today, though I have to. I just feel like if he isn't ready for me after 9 months he might not be ready for me for another 9 months, or even another 9 months after that. :(
I've been seeing a guy for about 9 months and I thought the main reason we weren't official was that he might be moving away, he isn't moving away anytime soon it turns out. He still doesn't want to put a label on things, and he does have good reasons that I won't share on here but I can't help but feel hurt. Recently I talked about my feelings with him (just before or after he found out he wasn't moving) and that I would want to progress and he said he would be open to giving it a try but then yesterday I bring it up again to make sure whether or not it was now official and he talked about how he doesn't like labels.
It feels like a stab in the stomach because I made it clear from the beginning I either wanted a platonic friendship OR a relationship and it seemed like he understood that. His feelings are important to me, and I don't want to pressure him into a relationship if he isn't ready to be in one...but I don't want to be just someone he is seeing and I am really confused at how he thinks not wanting a label would be any different from how we have been up until now.
I understand why he is unsure and I know it is hard on him too, but I can't take it anymore. I am considering just moving on. I feel so depressed I don't even want to go out today, though I have to. I just feel like if he isn't ready for me after 9 months he might not be ready for me for another 9 months, or even another 9 months after that. :(
