When was the most pain you've ever felt that wasn't physical?

Last year, I went through so much I almost left everything behind to find an isolated place to die alone. I broke up with my bestfriend/girlfriend of almost 2 years (knew her for about 9) shortly after I lost a dog violently, few months later I lost another dog violently and had to put down my dog the morning after. And because i knew i couldnt protect her i packed as much medical equipment and spare food/water as i could carry and walked like 3 hours away to the middle of nowhere, and upon resting i figured a life of starving, waiting for the next meal wasnt soemthing she deserved, so ultimately i walked all the way back. I still feel like absolute shit, but unfortunetly there wasnt much i could do. Lo and behold at the end of the year my cat died of a very bad infection. Last year was by far the worst year of my life.