how do i decline someone borrowing money? i have autism so i have trouble asserting myself. she keeps on pushing me that i let her borrow money
26-30, F
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MeowsoliniReturns · 51-55, F
@sadcarrot My pleasure! 🤗
eyeno · M
Good Way to loose friends and potential ones.
In my youth I too struggled with the word "NO".
Now when people in need ask or ask to borrow and I decide to give, I'll just resign myself to accept the fact that I'll never see it ever again, which is usually the case.
One such person actually hid her face as I passed by the table she was sitting at with co-workers in a restaurant.
I could have made a scene and probably have her fired (using company financial records) but felt this was payment enough (shame & guilt) from her.
In my youth I too struggled with the word "NO".
Now when people in need ask or ask to borrow and I decide to give, I'll just resign myself to accept the fact that I'll never see it ever again, which is usually the case.
One such person actually hid her face as I passed by the table she was sitting at with co-workers in a restaurant.
I could have made a scene and probably have her fired (using company financial records) but felt this was payment enough (shame & guilt) from her.
Oneofthestormboys · 100+, M
This must be very stressful for you.
I suggest that as have autism and may not be lucky enough to be assertive in conversation, to put how you feel in writing to the person in question (email). In this way, you can avoid the spontaneity in verbal conversations, be far more concise in how you feel and also establish an audit trail for the future if the request becomes overly invasive.
This is just my advice, and what I’d do in your position.
Take care x
I suggest that as have autism and may not be lucky enough to be assertive in conversation, to put how you feel in writing to the person in question (email). In this way, you can avoid the spontaneity in verbal conversations, be far more concise in how you feel and also establish an audit trail for the future if the request becomes overly invasive.
This is just my advice, and what I’d do in your position.
Take care x
Keepitsimple · 51-55, F
Picklebobble2 · 56-60, M
Say No !
Politely but firmly.
No need to get into the why nots
No I’m not going to lend you any money !
Keep it simple. That way they’re guaranteed to understand it
Politely but firmly.
No need to get into the why nots
No I’m not going to lend you any money !
Keep it simple. That way they’re guaranteed to understand it
CountScrofula · 41-45, M
All you can do is say "No, it is not nice to keep asking me. I cannot lend you money. It is not fair to pressure me like this."
in10RjFox · M
The problem is that you have money to lend. Get rid of it and you shall have no one pestering you anymore. 🤣
wackidywack · 26-30
tell her you need it for yourself, that you can't let her borrow
Bados · 100+, M
Learn to say no. Not easy but necessary
Lostpoet · M
Tell them you don't have any money to lend
Reflection2 · M
Keep on asking? Put a full stop to it.
SW-User
No.
That one word should suffice.
That one word should suffice.
TurtlePink · 22-25, F
Just say you have covid
Bushmanoz · 61-69, M
You can always say "lending money once ruined a really good friendship so I would rather not do it again and risk our friendship, I hope you understand"