Why do people ditch me and come back months later trying to be smooth?

@greenmountaingal You are probably so right. :'(

@LadyBronte That's why bad guys always come back as soon as they believe you've stopped being angry.

Most likely. I don't trust anyone anymore. So it really doesn't matter who does what.

@LadyBronte who needs um

I don't need anyone. If and when I ever do, I'll buy it somewhere.

I stopped dating in '93 when my long time boyfriend died of lung cancer. It was all too traumatic for me.

I. Sorry for your loss. That must have been devastating. :(

@LadyBronte On the day he died of lung cancer at the age of 41, (he was a heavy smoker), after nearly ten mostly happy years with him, within minutes of being informed of his death...I found out about all his [i]other[/i] lovers he'd been seeing for many years, all the lies he was so good at telling me. And I found out that he had married one of them 3 days before he died, on my birthday, in the resort town where he and I had spent a romantic weekend. It was a rich handsome woman he'd been seeing for years; she was married and when her husband walked in on them in his bedroom, he divorced her, leaving her free to marry my guy right before he died. I was now "the other woman" and was excluded from his funeral by his widow. I cried so much I couldn't go to work for 3 months. I did eventually locate his grave and visited it a few times. The last time I put a sign over his grave that read: WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST QUIT SMOKING?!

Aww...I'm so sorry. That is honestly terrible. What senseless heartache.

@LadyBronte There were some more revelations that eventually came out that were even worse than what I learned on the day he died. It all turned me into a permanent cynic.

I hate that for you. I really do. I'm just tired of it all. There is nothing down the road. I wish I had realized that in my 40s instead of wasting time, energy and what little heart I had left.

@LadyBronte Me, too. It just kills me when I read posts by young women just wasting their time, energies and emotions on men who are just playing with them or even outright abusing them.