Moved to Large City. Life Is So Superficial & Empty Here
For context, I've travelled a lot thru EU, so I got something to compare the city to.
Before moving, I was excited about meeting new people. going to events every other day, visiting new places, etc. I thought it'd be awesome. And this is a large city, so you'll never miss things to do.
And I did go to lots of events. Book clubs, board game nights, self-improvement groups, impro theaters, you name it. However, I noticed I feel more empty after the events than before them. As if the events haven't benefited me, but rather took something away from me, leaving me with an even bigger hole in my heart.
Then it hit me. In a large city, where millions of people live, you are presented w/ a plethora of options to choose from. Countless events, places, and people. And guess what? When you always have another event or social group as a backup plan, you've fewer reasons to really commit to it. Same w/ other people. And everybody knows that. So what ends up happening is that people spend less time building actual, meaningful connections. They're never to see me again, so why would they invest time and energy into connecting? Especially when they (in their head) have hundreds of better people to meet than me and hundreds of better events to go to.
The result is: People become commodities. If I don't fulfil your needs perfectly, you are seeking after someone else who will. Rather than valuing each person for what they are, seeing the flaws but acknowledging that we are flawed and that working thru those flaws is what makes human relationships beautiful.
I realized fairly recently that it's other people that makes this life meaningful. Now I understand that connection must be there too. No matter how many people you meet, it means nothing if there's no genuine connection. It's just empty and meaningless; social interaction for the sake of social interaction.
I'll be moving back to my home country soon, and I'm so happy because of it. I couldn't live here for long. It's so depressing. How did we allow ourselves to be like this?
Before moving, I was excited about meeting new people. going to events every other day, visiting new places, etc. I thought it'd be awesome. And this is a large city, so you'll never miss things to do.
And I did go to lots of events. Book clubs, board game nights, self-improvement groups, impro theaters, you name it. However, I noticed I feel more empty after the events than before them. As if the events haven't benefited me, but rather took something away from me, leaving me with an even bigger hole in my heart.
Then it hit me. In a large city, where millions of people live, you are presented w/ a plethora of options to choose from. Countless events, places, and people. And guess what? When you always have another event or social group as a backup plan, you've fewer reasons to really commit to it. Same w/ other people. And everybody knows that. So what ends up happening is that people spend less time building actual, meaningful connections. They're never to see me again, so why would they invest time and energy into connecting? Especially when they (in their head) have hundreds of better people to meet than me and hundreds of better events to go to.
The result is: People become commodities. If I don't fulfil your needs perfectly, you are seeking after someone else who will. Rather than valuing each person for what they are, seeing the flaws but acknowledging that we are flawed and that working thru those flaws is what makes human relationships beautiful.
I realized fairly recently that it's other people that makes this life meaningful. Now I understand that connection must be there too. No matter how many people you meet, it means nothing if there's no genuine connection. It's just empty and meaningless; social interaction for the sake of social interaction.
I'll be moving back to my home country soon, and I'm so happy because of it. I couldn't live here for long. It's so depressing. How did we allow ourselves to be like this?
