No one really knows all of me
Not even my Husband, of four and a half decades. My husband knows all but one part of me. ❤
That part I have kept safe and hidden from the world since the day it was almost killed when I was a kid. That part of me holds the key to my surrender of all that I am, to the one I trust without question, without fear, without reservation. It holds my kroptonit, and no one knows that part of me. I doubt anyone ever will.🤔
People see different sides of me, and for a minute, they think they know me, but then I show another side of me. This sometimes shocks people, and they walk away from me. This brings me deep sadness, but there is nothing I can do about it.😔
I am a multifaceted person, and the different aspects of my personality are so varied that no idea of who I am could ever fit me.I don't fit into any box, any category, or any type of person. The only constants are that I am kind, warm, and loving. 🤗
I was told by a counselor when I was a kid that I am easily adaptable. This was, maybe, a positive thing I developed as a kid, because my life changed drastically month after month.😔
The only sure thing about me is that what you see is what you get, but what you see may change often, depending on my emotions, triggers, energy level, what is happening to me online or offline, etc.😵💫
This isn't something that is easy for me, because I have found that it is hard for many people to get to know me or get close to me. Most can accept certain parts of me, but not all of them. I think this is why I don't let many people get close to me. This is also why I greatly fear rejection. I have been told by people in the past that they thought I had multiple personalities, but I have been tested, and I don't. My mother does have Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), and it looks a little different.😐
No, I just had to develop many different faces to get through my childhood. To fit in with people so vastly different from each other, I became a multifaceted person. I mean, when I was with my mom, she was wild and crazy and part of the party scene. So many different people, so many different places, so many different environments. 🫨
Then, when my mom got tired of being a mom, she would drop us off with the closest person and leave. Most of the time, it was my great-grandparents, but many times it was strangers. When I was with my great-grandparents, things were very calm, but very old-fashioned, so I learned this too. This part of my personality became the dominant part, but there are so many other parts to me that even if I wanted to explain, I couldn't. 😔
I am writing this because I want to let the new friends I am starting to make know that it would be unwise to think I am any one type of person. I want to let you all know this ahead of time, so if you don't want to be involved with me because of this mess that is my reality, you can walk away before any attachments form. I wish I could promise stability and predictability of my personality, but I just can't. I can promise to always be kind, caring, warm, and compassionate, even when I may seem crazy to others.🙂
[media=https://youtu.be/qs48neC0mNA]
[media=https://youtu.be/M7n4FMUOPGQ]
[media=https://youtu.be/8K9T-HL7mlQ]
[media=https://youtu.be/FHmBgDAAPN8]
[media=https://youtu.be/zWU_wAy_HHI]
That part I have kept safe and hidden from the world since the day it was almost killed when I was a kid. That part of me holds the key to my surrender of all that I am, to the one I trust without question, without fear, without reservation. It holds my kroptonit, and no one knows that part of me. I doubt anyone ever will.🤔
People see different sides of me, and for a minute, they think they know me, but then I show another side of me. This sometimes shocks people, and they walk away from me. This brings me deep sadness, but there is nothing I can do about it.😔
I am a multifaceted person, and the different aspects of my personality are so varied that no idea of who I am could ever fit me.I don't fit into any box, any category, or any type of person. The only constants are that I am kind, warm, and loving. 🤗
I was told by a counselor when I was a kid that I am easily adaptable. This was, maybe, a positive thing I developed as a kid, because my life changed drastically month after month.😔
The only sure thing about me is that what you see is what you get, but what you see may change often, depending on my emotions, triggers, energy level, what is happening to me online or offline, etc.😵💫
This isn't something that is easy for me, because I have found that it is hard for many people to get to know me or get close to me. Most can accept certain parts of me, but not all of them. I think this is why I don't let many people get close to me. This is also why I greatly fear rejection. I have been told by people in the past that they thought I had multiple personalities, but I have been tested, and I don't. My mother does have Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), and it looks a little different.😐
No, I just had to develop many different faces to get through my childhood. To fit in with people so vastly different from each other, I became a multifaceted person. I mean, when I was with my mom, she was wild and crazy and part of the party scene. So many different people, so many different places, so many different environments. 🫨
Then, when my mom got tired of being a mom, she would drop us off with the closest person and leave. Most of the time, it was my great-grandparents, but many times it was strangers. When I was with my great-grandparents, things were very calm, but very old-fashioned, so I learned this too. This part of my personality became the dominant part, but there are so many other parts to me that even if I wanted to explain, I couldn't. 😔
I am writing this because I want to let the new friends I am starting to make know that it would be unwise to think I am any one type of person. I want to let you all know this ahead of time, so if you don't want to be involved with me because of this mess that is my reality, you can walk away before any attachments form. I wish I could promise stability and predictability of my personality, but I just can't. I can promise to always be kind, caring, warm, and compassionate, even when I may seem crazy to others.🙂
[media=https://youtu.be/qs48neC0mNA]
[media=https://youtu.be/M7n4FMUOPGQ]
[media=https://youtu.be/8K9T-HL7mlQ]
[media=https://youtu.be/FHmBgDAAPN8]
[media=https://youtu.be/zWU_wAy_HHI]
