im nervous all the time

I havent spoke to someone but i think there is something odd going on with me, just from dealing with some traumatic things i haven't really spoken to someone... when i think about it, the pain in my chest in unbearable but it doesn't get tight, the sadness and anger t.hat comes last is what stops me from crying and i go through this phase of becoming numb all in one second i experience a mixture of trauma and intense feelings to the point i want to cry but i cant because fear anger fill me which cause me to be numb and the thought no longer is in my head