I Am a Sensitive Person
Sometimes Too Sensitive...
I have always been extremely sensitive for as long as I can remember. There are countless times that I am too sensitive for my own good and I always seem to end up hurt from it. I don't know why I'm like this, whether it is from the verbal abuse that was a nearly constant thing when I was a child and still happens quite often. As a child, and even now thinking on it, I would have much rather been hit or beat than to have some of these feelings. Most of the time its my own fault though. I think that beins so sensitive also makes me empathetic as there are many times I can "sense" a person's mood even without them giving any clues to it. And even when I know it isn't a smart idea, there are many times that I will let my guard down and that moment of vulnerability will get me hurt. I know how it feels to be hurt this way, and nothing upsets me more than to see someone being treated this way and whenever I can I try to prevent it or help anyone I can. I am almost always willing to be a friend and offer a sympathetic ear or moment with someone who needs it. I think the way I am helps me to be more receptive to others feelings and I often times try to keep from hurting others. Although I think this hurts me often because while I am not wanting to upset them, this mean that frequently I am not dtanding up for myself either. I just hate confrontations and try to avoid them, even after someone has got in my face about something. It usually goes the same way all the time, someone will attack me verbally and I will feel numb and as if my heart were torn from my chest and its like I crumble inside and then for however long it takes after wards I am obsessing over it in my mind and almost always beating mself emotionally ranging from anger at them for it to telling myself I deserved what happened. I don't like being this overly sensitive and many times I have wished to be a little stronger emotionally.
I have always been extremely sensitive for as long as I can remember. There are countless times that I am too sensitive for my own good and I always seem to end up hurt from it. I don't know why I'm like this, whether it is from the verbal abuse that was a nearly constant thing when I was a child and still happens quite often. As a child, and even now thinking on it, I would have much rather been hit or beat than to have some of these feelings. Most of the time its my own fault though. I think that beins so sensitive also makes me empathetic as there are many times I can "sense" a person's mood even without them giving any clues to it. And even when I know it isn't a smart idea, there are many times that I will let my guard down and that moment of vulnerability will get me hurt. I know how it feels to be hurt this way, and nothing upsets me more than to see someone being treated this way and whenever I can I try to prevent it or help anyone I can. I am almost always willing to be a friend and offer a sympathetic ear or moment with someone who needs it. I think the way I am helps me to be more receptive to others feelings and I often times try to keep from hurting others. Although I think this hurts me often because while I am not wanting to upset them, this mean that frequently I am not dtanding up for myself either. I just hate confrontations and try to avoid them, even after someone has got in my face about something. It usually goes the same way all the time, someone will attack me verbally and I will feel numb and as if my heart were torn from my chest and its like I crumble inside and then for however long it takes after wards I am obsessing over it in my mind and almost always beating mself emotionally ranging from anger at them for it to telling myself I deserved what happened. I don't like being this overly sensitive and many times I have wished to be a little stronger emotionally.
M
