I Admire Discipline

I've recently come to the conclusion that I am in major need of discipline in my life. I am very hard working and honest and compassionate, but I have no direction and I find it entirely impossible to use my own life as motivation to stay focused on anything.

I understand that a good amount of my lack of motivation may be attributed to some form of depression, but I know for a fact that if I had someone to put me in line and keep me there I would learn a lot about what it takes for me to find motivation.

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Eeyore122

You have to want it. How badly do you want it? I'm a student teacher... so much of why I do things is for the kids, or for my career.

Holdontothefire · 26-30, M

Haha that is my problem. I don't want anything. Apparently that's what depression is xD

Eeyore122

That IS part of it. I live with three forms of it. I am on antidepressabts and did counseling. Took a long time, but I am pretty stable now. Do you have a friend who would"stand up to you" so to speak? Someone who would help you make some goals and hold you to them? My mom had to call in one of mine at one point. We have a brother-sister relationship. He was in the Army at the time, and patience had never been his strength. He was empathetic, but he wasn't going to let me mess up my future.

Holdontothefire · 26-30, M

I actually had my first visit with a therapist last week because I know I need help to do things with my life. I literally have nobody like that. Nobody close to me has ever stood up to me or pushed me; just a bunch of passive family members and that only makes my negativity worse.

Eeyore122

I can be a friend here. I will challenge you!

Holdontothefire · 26-30, M

I'd be happy to have you to hold me accountable! People timidly try to help me, and now I have the encouragement of a professional, but none of that is like having a friend who is willing to be blunt.

Eeyore122

I am very empathetic, but I can be direct when I need to. :)

Holdontothefire · 26-30, M

Haha I could use a little directness!

Eeyore122

First of all. What is your major, etc? One thing that my therapists taught me that helps is whenever you don't want to do something, say "I don't want to do it-go to class, go to work, get out of bed, do homework, whatever it is- and I'm doing it anyway. Then, Do it. If it helps, keep a tally of when you gave in to your desires and when you followed through. Discuss results w/ therapist. On days you want to hide, make a point to go out with a friend.

Holdontothefire · 26-30, M

I'm going to message you xD