I am curious....

UPDATE: I think he got the hint .....He redeemed himself for Valentine's

While we just spent the evening at home, he DID dress the part.
I was pleasantly surprised as he could have easily just worn his 'comfy' clothes.

Would you be upset if you were going out on a date (with someone who you have been seeing for some time) to dinner and a comedy show and this person decides to wear sweats. Meanwhile, you have picked out a lovely outfit that fits the vibe for the evening. Would you be bothered by his/her lack of effort to meet your level of wardrobe choices?

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PoetryNEmotion · F

I think you could discuss what to wear before the date. And if you have been dating for awhile this person likely knows how you feel about this topic? Did you talk to him when you realized he was going to wear sweats? I have 2 pairs of colorful sweat pants. I wear them on cold days or nights and never in public. I think they belong in home and not in public, myself. Maybe at the gym because slobbishness doesn't matter there.

skmokisses · 46-50, F

@PoetryNEmotion We did discuss prior to the date. He actually picked out what I was wearing. So, I assumed, he would be dressed accordingly. I did bring it up when I discovered he would be wearing sweats. The conversation was a bit charged and I felt as if possibly he was using this to maybe get out of going.

WindTherapy · 56-60, M

@skmokisses He picked out what you were wearing? Wow......that just takes this to another level. It's not like he misunderstood the evening. I'll be the first to admit I can miss clues in this regard. But if I'm helping to pick out my date's attire, I damn well better bring my game to match hers.

skmokisses · 46-50, F

@WindTherapy My thought as well. I assumed because he indicated what he would like me to wear that he would be matching my attire.

PoetryNEmotion · F

@skmokisses Well, your comment adds a new level to this. He picked out classy clothing for you and then decided to dress slob casual. This is disrespectful. Did you go on the date with him dressed in sweats? I would have asked him why he dressed that way. I would have asked him if he even wanted to go. Do you find this kind of problem in general with him in your relationship? Sometimes dating after a long period of time means people take each other for granted and no longer feel they have to care about their appearance. I would discuss this topic further with him. Is he the right kind of partner for you?

skmokisses · 46-50, F

@PoetryNEmotion I felt it was disrespectful as well. Yes, I did question his selection of clothing. Didn't go well when I expressed that I felt like I was a reflection of him on this date and visa versa. He appeared to take that as some sort of personal attack on his character. He proceeded to have a passive-aggressive tantrum. We did continue on the date. It was a double date actually and we had already paid several hundred dollars to see this comedian. If not, then I think he totally would have canceled because of my response.

PoetryNEmotion · F

@skmokisses Do you think you should pursue this topic again because it has caused you a lot of concern? I wish you better communication and understanding and respect.

skmokisses · 46-50, F

@PoetryNEmotion Communication is important, so yes to me it is worth pursuing.