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Not sure why but I've had some school memories pop into my mind. Unfortunately they were unhappy ones.

Sometimes I'll have random memories come to the surface that I had forgotten about or wished I hadn't remembered.

Memory 1: There was this list going around made by some girls in my class ranking everyone based on their looks. I forget how old I was exactly but I believe maybe junior high? Everything was out of 10 with 10 being the best. I remember sitting next to one of the girls who made the list in class. I glanced into her desk and saw my name with a 2 next to it. I know I'm a dud in the looks department. As an adult I've accepted that fact but growing up that hurt a lot. I remember being extremely quiet the rest of the day withdrawing from everyone and everything.

Memory 2: I was maybe 7 or 8? I was new in this particular school that year. A girl was throwing a party and I remember being excited to go. She pretty much had said oh no not you you're not invited. I remember feeling hurt because I was rejected in front of the entire class that was invited. I remember that year being hard for me. I was rejected a lot. I didn't have friends at that school for a very long time.

Memory 3: The last one that came to mind I was older here. Grade 6. I was never gifted at math. This particular teacher had this special table where students who needed extra assistance had to sit. The table was in the very front of the room in front of all the other desks. I remember my name being called to sit at that table many a time. I used to call it the shame table because all I felt sitting at it was shame and embarrassment. All those eyes on me probably laughing at me thinking oh he's at the table again what an idiot. This same teacher would call you up to the board to solve a problem. She would have many of us go up at once and solve the problems on the board. If you didn't get the problem right she would make you stand there until you got it right. You can guess who stood there the longest majority of the time. That's right it was me. I used to feign illness to go home early to avoid that class. My mother caught onto my pattern and tricks and no longer believed me whenever I claimed to be sick. It was never why do you keep avoiding that class what's wrong? It was more of a how dare you pretend to be sick to get out of class. How dare you be a slacker. What's the matter with you? Why was I cursed with such a lazy stupid son.

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