I Would Rather Be Alone Than Be With the Wrong Person

I had a dream about you last night... Your wife wasn't around, and you wanted to act like nothing ever changed... All you wanted to do was cuddle, you said...

But you and I both know that when you put the two of us together, there is an alchemical reaction that neither of us has any control over.

I felt it again... In my dream, I let go of the fear and melted into you. It felt so good to hold you again, but I didn't let you reciprocate. I snuck up behind you, pressed my cheek on you back, my arms reaching under yours to grab your shoulders.

I knew EXACTLY what would happen when you turned around... The anticipation reverberated through my entire body. The anticipatory vibrations increasing in intensity with the force you exert. I want it to happen, but I need it to be my surrender, not your conquer. So I squeeze my body up against yours, not letting you get fully turned...

I take one last breath of you in.... And as I exhale you... I surrender to you completely!

I was right.... It felt like home again.... We clicked right into that sweet familiar groove that fits perfectly into itself. I was a snail, settling into its shell.

And just like that... It was gone....

Time to wake up and get the kids to school, alone. Time to go to work, by myself. Time to live my life as a slug.

I'm not a slug... Just a snail without a home.