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I Would Rather Be Alone Than Be With the Wrong Person

Alone, Not Lonely... People need to learn the difference. Being alone doesn't necessarily means someone is lonely. As being lonely may caused by aloneness, but there are many other reasons for that. There are many lonely people that are actually in a relationship. Now how does that happen?
When we are lonely, we feel alone even in a crowded place because we can't find a way to feel their presence.
I may be alone, but I'm not lonely. In fact I'm pretty contented with what I have.
Being with the wrong person is not an option for me. It's exhausting. Waste of energy. Waste of feeling and emotion. Waste of time. If you want to try and work it out, go ahead. No one's stopping you. If it works, well congratulations. If not, you could try again and wait, or you could start to accept the fact that it won't happen.
Try again and wait, hoping, that it would eventually works. But until when? When is eventually? They say everybody deserves a second chance. I am, for one, not that royal. Second chance is a gift bestowed upon you and you must, respect it, use it to prove that you're worthy of that chance.
I've seen enough, to know that many people don't appreciate the second chance given to them. Some, don't even deserve it.
I know it sounds harsh and heartless, but it's the ugly truth.
We deserves better, we deserves to be with the right person and to find that we need to let go of the wrong person.
Stargazer311
I enjoy being alone. I'm a huge introvert and an completely happy on my own. I like to socialize, but on my own terms. I really like how you explained everything, that is how I feel all the time.

My husband mentioned divorce and I agreed. Then somehow he saw the light and wants to work on things..... We've been together almost 6 years. And I have felt Lonely for probably 5 of those.

He doesn't understand. I don't want to hurt him. I just wish he'd let me go peacefully. Physically and mentally there is no attraction for me to him, but he insists that he can change and that I will want to be with him.....

Thoughts????
aclicheword · 31-35, F
Well thank you. :)
In a way of accepting aloneness we have similarities and I'm happy that someone else get what I'm saying.
5 whole years? Wow, how do you manage? I mean that is not a short period of time. I get the not wanting to hurt him part. But I don't really see the cause of the loneliness part. He's willing to work things out and change, but it doesn't make any difference or what? The cause of your none-attraction to him is the key. You need to find out do you still love him.
You could try to take a vacation together, just the two of you, it doesn't have to be far, just a road trip, couple of days, and see if you guys can have back the chemistry. Sometimes all you need is just a change of scenery and a gettaway from routines to feel all those love again.
Or another approach is you guys stay away from each other and you see if you could live without him.
You really need to think this through before you make any decision.
sciguy18
You're right that there's a difference between being alone and being lonely. I think many people are in relationships (or stay in them longer) simply because they fear being alone. Whether a person deserves a second (or third) chance is case-specific. It will be interesting to see what your feelings will be later on in life.
aclicheword · 31-35, F
Yes, when you're in a relationship, somehow you get used to having someone, you get dependent, you're becoming vulnerable... So some choose to stay, even in an unhealthy relationship.
Ahh, right. It would be interesting.

 
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