I Am So Alone

I grew up but I never matured, my life lacked the love & compassion so essential to one's developement.

So I'm here, broken, and I barely know it, only by seeing the life in other's eyes do I know that something is missing, something is wrong.

I am compassionless, both in that I have little compassion & am shown so little, maybe one created the other, maybe they developed individually.

All that I know is that I want that compassion, that I'm missing it, that I'm broken & it breaks me still.

Someone look into my eyes, though my ex<x>pressions may change, my eyes reveal something different.

I know why you don't look in my eyes, I understand the reasons that my words or my presence may make you somewhat confused, somewhat uncomfortable, but let your love shine through to me, shine light into the dark I'm trapped in, show me a way out, be my way out.. please.

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QuestionMarks

Just wanted to share this with you. This pretty much speaks my heart and what I was trying to say about love. Love is not easy. It is not an exchange between two humans. It is beyond humans- it is a powerful force within the universe itself that calls to you that is imbued with wisdom. Love itself sustains a person. True love gives. I have no idea if you believe in God but let me say that other qualities God has, but love is what He is and when you accept love from Him you will understand the power of giving love and love will shape you and mold you. When you let love be who you are you will in fact get love back but getting love is not something to seek, it comes to you.

From my favorite poet and philospher, a very wise man (Kahlil Gibran):

When love beckons to you, follow him,
Though his ways are hard and steep.
And when his wings enfold you yield to him,
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.
And when he speaks to you believe in him,
Though his voice may shatter your dreams
as the north wind lays waste the garden.

For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.
Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,
So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.

Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself.
He threshes you to make you naked.
He sifts you to free you from your husks.
He grinds you to whiteness.
He kneads you until you are pliant;
And then he assigns you to his sacred fire, that you may become sacred bread for God's sacred feast.

All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart, and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life's heart.

But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure,
Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love's threshing-floor,
Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.
Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself.
Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;
For love is sufficient unto love.

When you love you should not say, "God is in my heart," but rather, "I am in the heart of God."
And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.

Kerennya

Khalil Gibran has some great things to say, doesn't he? Thanks so much for sharing this!

QuestionMarks

Yes for him, all aspects of life flow from love. Once you truly understand love, life will work in its perfect balance. The sad part are those who see him as a mere poet and think his words are just flowery fluff, when in fact he himself says, 'let me speak my truths to you' and then speaks of how to have a solid foundation to every aspect of life. I love his observations and wisdom.