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TheSquirrel
It has been thirty years since I lost a friend because he shot himself. It was very angering to many of us at the time. To others among his friends, simply a shocking void. To his family and girlfriend, a bleeding wound forever, I would guess.
As time has gone by, I think of him more and more. He missed out on so many things. Many of us have grown kids already. Our emotional lives have smoothed out. And for all the stupid stuff that goes on these days, in so many respects our society makes fewer demands to conform, so we are largely more comfortable now than we were at seventeen.
As time has gone by, I think of him more and more. He missed out on so many things. Many of us have grown kids already. Our emotional lives have smoothed out. And for all the stupid stuff that goes on these days, in so many respects our society makes fewer demands to conform, so we are largely more comfortable now than we were at seventeen.
SleepingSupernova · 22-25, F
How did you find out...
TheSquirrel
He shot himself on Sunday night. I went into school Monday morning, yucking it up, but no one laughed. Then they told me.
SleepingSupernova · 22-25, F
Can you explain the initial shock please..
TheSquirrel
All the guys were just sitting in silence (boy's school). Many teachers were upset. We had the only school psychiatrist (I think in the state) at the time, 1982. My dead friend and I were in a class of his as well. He, the psychologist/teacher, was so undone he burst into tears in class and had to step into the hall for awhile.
TheSquirrel
They ended up having a day for all of us in that class to go off-campus and sort things out. They were smart enough to realize that if you have one suicide, you can easy have a few more. It was brilliant. Loads, and I mean tons, of boys were very angry. Not really at our friend, but at our new reality. Our school administration saved the day. I am still grateful to them.
TheSquirrel
Everyone went to the funeral, all the way out to the the mausoleum. The family wisely asked that the crowd stay back and only they, his girlfriend, and a couple of really close friends do the last part. They handled it will iron dignity. That helped also.
SleepingSupernova · 22-25, F
Sounds beautiful.... Yet terrible...
TheSquirrel
A generation later and it might not have happened at all. We are way more open about depression, there are sites like the EP, effective and low side effect medicines abound, and there are deeper understandings of the underlying factors -- leading to better therapies.
SleepingSupernova · 22-25, F
That is true.....