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How does it feel to secretly like your best friend?

Firefighter343
The worst ever especially if they dont seem to feel the same way. I have never to this day been more in love with anyone than I was with her. The worst was when she kept saying she had a secret to tell me and kept stringing me along with it for weeks. I was positive that it was finally going to happen. I flirted more than ever, bought her things, told all my other friends, and who knows what else because i just knew what she was going to tell me.
So then it happened, the day that will never leave my memory for the rest of my life. She grabbed my hands, asked me the usual "how much do you love me?" whenever she wanted something, and then turned bright red. My response was a well rehearsed, "I love you more than anything, I always have." Without even taking a breath she came back with, "good, then you wont mind asking Dan out for me?" I could have died right there on the spot, I was so caught off guard that I couldn't even answer.
They dated for a little while before this one night we were all 3 at her house, somehow the conversation about kissing came up and she had Dan and I arguing back and forth about who was better. She eventually said that she would be the judge. Dan was speechless but she quickly justified it by telling him how long her and I had been friends and that we didnt think of each other in that way. So he agreed, one of us left the room (I dont remember who went first) and the other went. Either way, I was nervous and in shock because her and I had never kissed before... so we leaned in and had the most unbelievable kiss id ever had to date. That kissed changed it all lol! We must have kissed for a while because Dan finally opened the door and told us enough.
From that day forward her and I would sneek a kiss any chance we could while Dan wasnt looking. The long awaited step in our relationship didnt last long at all, maybe a month if that. One night we somehow worked it out that I was going to stay at her house which was a huge deal because i was 15 lol. We didnt really do too much but we had this overwhelming feeling of guilt about
going behind Dan's back, so much that we went to our separate rooms and didnt talk anymore that night.
That was the night that ended the longest lasting friendship i had at that point. Everyone at school knew something major happened because her and I had been inseparable since Kindergarten.
We pretty much went our separate ways from that night on. She still denies that it even happened if other people we know are around. Now our relationship is saying Happy Birthday and Merry Christmas over text . I never understood what really happened between us and I still love her to death today.

Sorry that was so long. I should find a group to put that story in lol. It was nice to think about that girl again though while I typed. Thanks!
SleepingSupernova · 22-25, F
You are definitely welcomed. Reading this was my pleasure.
Firefighter343
Thank you :)
Dollyismyleader
I totally fell in love with mine and felt like a pervert for fancying him when he (as far as I knew at the time) thought of me as a friend.

I'm happy to report that, unbeknown to me, he was also in the same boat and it was bloody wonderful for a while.
SleepingSupernova · 22-25, F
Rather lovely at best..
Dollyismyleader
The experience has given me some of my favourite memories. I'd recommend it :)
SleepingSupernova · 22-25, F
Eh, I think he still sees me as his friend... But thanks for your answer, dear.
EresParaMi
I don't think i've ever been in love with my bf.
ARTOFNOISE
I OPENLY LIKE ALL MY FRIENDS.
slothlorien
mostly terrible.

 
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