I got a message

@ChiefWalksWith40oz He is involved with someone though. So we will both stay silent for now. I know he has a thing for me too, he always has. But we are the same and he is also afraid to say something

@Justgirl damn you slacked it on that one big time 😬 I feel you though, I've been there. Ended up having to let it go eventually. We were friends for a long time but we had to detach completely

@ChiefWalksWith40oz i sure did. Im sorry youve had to feel like that too. That mist have been hard. I tried to detach completely. But he feels like part of me. So its better to have him as a friend than not at all

@Justgirl it's okay now, at the time it hurt like hell but she found somebody who she married & had kids with. I found somebody else & it didn't work out but it kinda showed me that my old friend wasn't really real love. I think it was mostly idealized between the two of us thinking it's what we wanted

I get you though. I just hope being friends doesn't hurt more over time. It can get unhealthy at times

@ChiefWalksWith40oz i bet it did. Im glad to hear you learned from it in some way.
I dont know if it will hurt me. If he is truly happy, then im happy for him. I just hope hes not living the life I lived. Just making it work for the kids and the sake of a belief system.
If he is ever single, Ill let him know how i feel 100%

@Justgirl I recently discovered that I still have her on instagram (I don't use it) so I got to see pictures & she looks happy. I'm glad for that. Plus it appears I beat her in our old tattoo contest 😅
But that's a good way to think of it. At least you're not toxic about it. If it happens then cool, but if it doesn't I really hope you discover someday that life worked out anyway

@ChiefWalksWith40oz Its good you can check in evrry now and then. You two had a tattoo contest? Thats pretty cool.
Yeah i think ive had enough toxic to last me a lifetime. So i dint even wish to be that to anyone.
Thats how i see it too

@Justgirl yeah she started getting tattoos long before me so I challenged her that I'd pass her up 😂 she was actually the person I lost my virginity to when I was a teenager too. Maybe that's part of why I held on.
You seem wise though. I like that 👌

@ChiefWalksWith40oz ahh the first. It definietly could be. They can be tricky for a couple of years or so. Its good you were able to let her go and still have some sweet memories but see it for what it was.
Thank you :)

@Justgirl yeah we stayed close for years but we were just aways in different places. We walked different paths that never crossed.
Hope your day/night is well though 😌