I Live In a Sexless Marriage

Would someone please give me a virtual hug? I really need one.

It's hard enough not having human touch or affection for years, but dealing with this while I feel ill, for the last week, as I have, then the washing machine won't work, and I just want to cry.

I went to the grocery store, and felt so bad, I couldn't think straight. A nice young man helped me find my items, and I was looking at him thinking...."please give me a hug, and tell me it's going to be okay."

I just wanted comfort and someone to care about me, but it's never there for me...just me...alone...trying to get through in a life of solitude.

If I die, it will be from deprivation of love, care, and touch for decades. It eats you from the inside out, and you feel like you are dying a slow death.

I just deal with it, but when I'm sick, it becomes too much to deal with.

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RexCorvus · 51-55, M

GIANT UNDERSTANDING ((HUGS))!!!

Carissimi · 70-79, F

Thank you. I wrote this a while back, but I'm still in need of a hug, so it's appreciated. Hug back.

RexCorvus · 51-55, M

Thank you Carissimi. I am sorry. I know that feeling all too well. The despair that strikes for just the longing to be touched. That deprivation,the slow death as you called it. It seems to strike me most in the quiet moments. Those late hours in the dark when you stare at the ceiling. It is why I overload myself. Better to be exhausted.

Carissimi · 70-79, F

@RexCorvus: I'm sorry. It was a torture for over 25-years. I thought it would kill me at times...the deprivation...maybe it will, but age has done something strange to me, which is probably best left unsaid.

Exhaustion is probably a good strategy to deal with it. I'm exhausted in a different way. Burnt out exhausted, which doesn't have the same effect. Too much deprivation of a basic human need over a prolonged period is very damaging.

I do hope your need for touch is resolved. You are so young. I was 37 when the deprivation started, now I'm over 60. It's been a horrible life experience.

RexCorvus · 51-55, M

I'm so very sorry. I appreciate you sharing your wisdom. Thank you. ((HUGS))!