Given these two scenarios,Which do you prefer to marry;

1.Someone who loves you so much, but you're not much into them(but will only consider them when your options dont work out or will try to see if your love for them will grow)

2.Someone whom you love much , but are not that much into you(but will only consider you when their options dont work out or will try to see if their love for you will grow)

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Picklebobble2 · 56-60, M

As an older man, my immediate thought is both are a bad idea for marriage.

But then the thought occurs that maybe the 'choice' isn't one of your making ?

If your question is based on the 'options' available perhaps due to an arranged marriage, then #1 is probably the better choice.

Why ?
Because marriage is hard work. Especially at your age.
Expectations and pressure from family along with the responsibilities of trying to make such a life work in terms of keeping your wife happy; her family happy as well as trying to earn a living at the same time, must be awfully stressful.

If the woman you're marrying already loves you, at least you have something of a basis on which to build a life.
Marrying someone who wouldn't consider you unless all other options were spent, means they had to 'settle'.
And if you have to try and make a life together, nobody wants to 'settle'.
Because you'll always wonder if somebody they preferred came along, would they stay ?