How I Know That I’m Messed Up
Because whenever I go out there’s a certain amount of attention that flows my way. But I can’t find the thing that clicks into place.
I have no problem in the moment with my confidence, my moves, or putting myself out there.
I have the wry smile, and my blue eyes, and I may not be a model but I’m not that terrible to look at either.
When I’m dancing and I’m feeling it…, girls, women, and old ladies gravitate towards me on the dance floor.
I get more than my fair share of offers, but I just can’t bring myself to follow these interactions to their obvious conclusions.
It’s messed up.
My friends and the guys at work are always saying things like “Dude, she wants you to tap her.”
“Bro, you coulda got wit dat!”
“What’s wrong with her?”
“What’s wrong with you?”
I just blow it all off and say…, “I know…, I know “
It’s quite possible that I’ve already wasted all my chances at true love ? Who knows, maybe I even blew off a true love in one of those random interactions because I shut it down without even thinking much about it ?
I often wonder about a friend with benefits, or the random hook ups after dancing some poor girl out of her pants and comfort zones. I think about the dating sites and shit like that.
None of it seems right and I seriously think that I’m just not going to meet another woman that’s truly available and into me. There’s an amazing woman on SW that makes me swoon. But she’s tied up and I doubt she thinks about me the way I think about her. And even if she does, she’s got her stuff and is hundreds of miles away.
There’s a woman in my town that I could see myself with. She’s got a jerk ass boy friend that she complains about constantly. I don’t think getting involved in that is something I’m into or need.
Love kinda sucks and romance seems to float further and further away from my mind and soul.
Having been ruined by almost every single person I’ve chosen to love and give myself to has definitely taken a real toll on my mindset.
It’s how I know that I’m all messed up.
As much as I want that love that I can carry to the end, all I have are regrets and feelings that go untended.
At least I have dance moves and a decent attitude.
I could if I wanted.
I guess maybe I just don’t want to?
I don’t even know.
I have no problem in the moment with my confidence, my moves, or putting myself out there.
I have the wry smile, and my blue eyes, and I may not be a model but I’m not that terrible to look at either.
When I’m dancing and I’m feeling it…, girls, women, and old ladies gravitate towards me on the dance floor.
I get more than my fair share of offers, but I just can’t bring myself to follow these interactions to their obvious conclusions.
It’s messed up.
My friends and the guys at work are always saying things like “Dude, she wants you to tap her.”
“Bro, you coulda got wit dat!”
“What’s wrong with her?”
“What’s wrong with you?”
I just blow it all off and say…, “I know…, I know “
It’s quite possible that I’ve already wasted all my chances at true love ? Who knows, maybe I even blew off a true love in one of those random interactions because I shut it down without even thinking much about it ?
I often wonder about a friend with benefits, or the random hook ups after dancing some poor girl out of her pants and comfort zones. I think about the dating sites and shit like that.
None of it seems right and I seriously think that I’m just not going to meet another woman that’s truly available and into me. There’s an amazing woman on SW that makes me swoon. But she’s tied up and I doubt she thinks about me the way I think about her. And even if she does, she’s got her stuff and is hundreds of miles away.
There’s a woman in my town that I could see myself with. She’s got a jerk ass boy friend that she complains about constantly. I don’t think getting involved in that is something I’m into or need.
Love kinda sucks and romance seems to float further and further away from my mind and soul.
Having been ruined by almost every single person I’ve chosen to love and give myself to has definitely taken a real toll on my mindset.
It’s how I know that I’m all messed up.
As much as I want that love that I can carry to the end, all I have are regrets and feelings that go untended.
At least I have dance moves and a decent attitude.
I could if I wanted.
I guess maybe I just don’t want to?
I don’t even know.
