The dot of my lately problem already solved.

First of all i like to thanks to my mutual friends on this forum who try to help me and give me some advice, give me some support to stay be strong and gives me some hopes. I was lucky to found this forum that i can talk or say something without getting judged when i was so lost before.

So i was meet my brother this afternoon and we talk about what happened before, and i was say what i need to say to him, we argue many things on those particular problems that we go through. And we decided to forgive each other beside the situation get more intense when i was talk to him. He tell me that he loves me so much and he's not sincere if I'm with the wrong person at that time (which is my crush before it happens)

But i was so confused and understand what his sacrifice to me and my family until i grows up, then on the next argue we seek a middle way to get along with a person we like without break the bond we build, since we were kid. And the result is. I can be with another person same with him, but we were still have that connection (something that more than bond between brother and sister) but we agreed to do it naturally without Force or coercion.

Until we realized that we must let each other to grow and don't blame each other. After we argued long enough i was feel normal again and feel Relieved that the problem is solved without any break the bond between us.

So i go to too his boarding home and we start a small conversation and have some jokes when we go homes, but i still feel clumsy little bit but not that awkward.

And after we arrive we just be a normal again and we letting go of that burden off when we are together. And then i become more open about it (some of the taboo things). Finally we were hug and he kiss my cheeks and My forehead and then say his sorry.

It's been a midnight when i was finished writing this and he seems tired and me too, i'm sorry i can't reply all of your massage one by one, because it's a lot of massages, maybe i will reply on the next day.

Thanks for the ones who read this not important note especially until the end, Thanks to all of you 💕