No he just has a crush on your vibrator

It's probably wondering why you've not asked it out on a date yet.

It it's the latest go-pro equipped model, yes. Put some clothes on.😮

*watches the camera feed* ... What??? No way ...

It's gathering data on what food crumbs it's vacuuming up so it can sell the information to Google to provide you with relevant, product based ads when you use the internet. Get a lot of Doritos ads, don't you? ;)

Kinda weird when it follows you around isn't it.

Yes. Big brother is watching you.

Yes

AND peeking up your skirt.

What would it say if it could talk ??