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Has anyone here ever been on Tinder or Bumble? I always thought they were hookup sites, 97 percent of women say no hookup, no FWB, looking for LTR. ??

Tatsumi · 31-35, M
Women won't actively admit they want a hookup even if they do out of fear of being perceived as a slut. It's basically subtext, like a lot of woman things. You're supposed to understand that they want sex, but can't admit it; so, you have to get them to the point where they want it, so they have plausible deniability and can be like "I didn't *intend* to have sex with him, but we just clicked so well, it just happened."

That said, they'll definitely hookup, but usually only with top tier guys or with guys who know the right buttons to push to allow her the freedom and comfort to be sexual.

It's basically what do they get out of it, right? Sex isn't worth it just on its own. It has to be with a genetically ideal candidate to justify the instinctual-feeling of risking their lives. There has to be comfort there, first, because fucking for fucking's sake isn't in their DNA, really. Except maybe bipolar chicks in a manic state. Or chemically altered chicks. Even then, 99% of the time, the woman has a LOT of needs to be checked off first before they are comfortable being sexual.

I've met up with some chicks who had "hookup" on there, but at the same time, they don't want to just fuck; they want their brain fucked first, even if they are specifically seeking sex. Sex starts virtually entirely in a woman's mind, not her body. Which is why 90% of romance novel readers are women.

Or I guess it's more accurate to say the body wants sex, but the mind restricts the circumstances upon which it is allowed.

Basically, you have to know women: what they want, how they think, and what they need.
ShaythePanTransMan · 18-21, T
[@437744,Tatsumi] That's so sad.... Well, I don't think I'd want to waste my time with someone who doesn't know what they want anyway.... The only cis woman I've ever dated pursued me, not the other way around.

I often wish I was a woman, actually, because I think my life would've been better that way. I didn't give up being a woman; I was born a girl, but my gender was chosen to be male. I didn't choose to not be a woman because gender doesn't work like that. I believe sometimes people are born with differing sex and gender, and those people have to work to align the two or they suffer.
REMsleep · 41-45, F
[@437744,Tatsumi] I have to admit that you are pretty accurate in your description of how it all goes down but you sound like you are kinda saying that women are not being honest with themselves or that they are full of crap.
I understand how hard it can be for men but then 2 seconds later I feel no sympathy again because "most men are dogs" blah, blah
Also I feel that you are missing something in the thought process of women and not doing justice to the who, what and why.
Tatsumi · 31-35, M
[@867436,REMsleep] I addressed the who and the why. But yes, women are complicated and convoluted creatures, so no I don't think they have much of an idea what they need or want. And we're only aware of 10% of what makes us us according to the sub/unconscious model. So no one really knows themselves. What are you saying I missed?

Female supremacists are not attractive. "Men are dogs" is basically just saying "Men should be more like women." Well, we're not. Either accept it or reject it.

Women don't really have a need to care about how it is for men; and, most men have no idea what women want or how they think. So everyone is walking around expecting others to be exactly like they are and unable to accept the other's nature.

The one's who can accept the other's nature will do infinitely better, in the end.

Women need to understand men are physical and visual creatures; and, men need to understand that women are mental and emotional creatures. That's just how it is.
EnigmaticGeek · 61-69, M
I'm on Bumble.

The women who want casual are usually seeking a sugar daddy. If you're into that, and have the cash, you might be able to hook up with one or more.
Chevy454 · 41-45, M
Gotcha. [@4406,EnigmaticGeek]
ShaythePanTransMan · 18-21, T
I haven’t. My good friend uses Bumble though, but she’s not looking for hookups or FWB.
Eh, I guess I’ll just try to hook up with the guys then if I start using Tinder or Bumble.
I've hooked up with people from Tinder and Bumble.
Chevy454 · 41-45, M
Just joined both yesterday and all I see for the most part is marriage and LTR and want kids!! Uggghhhh!![@405723,AmbivalentFriability]
[@1004204,Chevy454] I wonder if your age range makes a difference, or where you live?
People looking for something serious on Tinder are delusional.
On Bumble you can filter profiles so you only see people who are "looking for" the same things as you.
Chevy454 · 41-45, M
Very possible I’ve expanded into late 20’s but still the same. I don’t think it’s location. It’s South Florida [@405723,AmbivalentFriability]
ElSenordeLosCielos · 22-25, F
They say that but it’s not true. especially on Tinder.

 
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