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I Have a Crush On Someone I Shouldn't

Idk if any of you cares but if some weird way you do,then here is an update on my love life.

Ádám's bday is on 3oth of july,i texted him wishing happy birthday ( i was abroad at the time btw)
He didn't text me back until 1 or 2 am... he said i am sweet but he feels like we've to talk about us.he said he doesn't want anything because he is in a good relationship.so yeah...
But after that things changed,he still cared and flirted with me but everytime i tried to do the same he pulled away.
So many little things happened,i won't write them down though.

When i went back to work after my vacation he kept saying he doesn't know what to do without me etc. ( he was no longer my boss i got promoted and he was super happy and supportive)
Once my new boss talked shit about me and he tried to low key protect me then he made an inside joke about it.
He noticed me and that other male coworker are friends so from that they as his boss he was a complete ass to him.one day he brought his gf back to work,he was starring at me guess he tried to read my expression - thank god i've a bad vision :D .


Late december i told our boss that i wanna quit.
He immediately came up to me and asked if it's true.
Then he asked me almost everyday how long i have to stay - never told him cause when i asked why he always said something like "oh i don't care".then hekept asking if i'll go to the dinner party on the 29th.
My last day was 20th of january.til that day i worked at my "new" and old position so i was working beside him again.
Just like on my last day he came up to me,asked my opinion,tried to chat with me.
On that day i asked that male coworker if he is mad at me,Ádám interrupted him and said he is mad at me but i probably don't give a shit about it.(oh btw he got mad at me before when i didn't talk to him for 5 days but i dare to ask him about our boss)


He was with me all day,teased me and smiled but he finished work an hour earlier than me and he didn't say goodbye to me.he just left.
I cooked him,something he wanted me to prepare for him.
I couldn't give it to him so i wrote a note and put it into his locker.
A few days later ahad to go back.he was cute like always,told me i should come back...
No words about the food,he didn't even touched it.

Before the dinner me and a bunch of friend met and grabbed some drink,then we also drank during the party.
When he arriced he immediately looked at me then to that guy friend whom sat next to me...
He drank a lot of beer then all of a sudden left.he left before the waiter came back with his next glass of beer - guess his gf told him to go back.

So i was pissed and tipsy.so i texted him at 2:30 am...
It went something like that:


now that i saw you again i still can't believe you let me go without saying goodbye,and let's not talk about the pasta.... i know i used to be really cold to you,but i thought thhis will help changing things between us.lately you tried to do the exact same thing but it didnt work either,at this point we just need to admit that there was,is and always wil be chemistry like it or not. i am sorry if you felt like you have to compete for my attention or that you aren't good enough.you are perfect the way you are,you shouldn't believe what your gf says,and not leeting her force you into a toxic relationship and make you a puppet.i am sorry to say that,but trust me iwould be the happiest if she would truly love you and take care of you.fingers crossed there isnt such thing as the one otherwise we are screwed

No reply of course.


I don't think i've mentioned his toxic relationship here before.
Well he can't go anywhere,he have to check in...he has to tell her how much time left of his lunchbreak,she forced him to get another job so they can go on vacation but yelled at him because he couldn't helped around the apartment.he can't go to uni cause he couldn't buy stuff she wants...
He used to party and smoke weed - "used to" when he was a teenager.he is 22 almost 23... - and she made him believe that she saved him from himself.
Guilt.that's her thing.making him feel guilty for wanting to have a normal life.

I don't have a crush on him anymore.
I'm in love with him.
I hope he'll realize what's going on soon.

Thoughts? ( i doubt the forget him thing could work just sayin' )
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wudifu · 46-50, M
I was scatching my head right throughout your mail....I was so confused....but why be so complicated ....are u playing hard to get....why don't u just tell him how u feel
Girlbehindthecurtain · 31-35, F
I think my text were pretty obvious how i feel
wudifu · 46-50, M
but if nothing has happened....then why don't u just tell him ....or do u think u would be pushing it too much onto him and he might not feel the same
Girlbehindthecurtain · 31-35, F
Tbh i don't know because it kinda looks like he does...or what if i scare him away?
Or what i think is actually going on - he thinks he owes her something and can-t leave her or something
wudifu · 46-50, M
no I think u should go up to him and say u love him or have a crush on him....don't wait ....its gonna bother you the longer you wait just get it off your chest and give him the chance to see what he wants
Girlbehindthecurtain · 31-35, F
I'm not that brave
wudifu · 46-50, M
i said it to my P.a. the other day and it went well to say the least....just take that leap
Girlbehindthecurtain · 31-35, F
But i texted him...wouldn't it be painful and pointless?
wudifu · 46-50, M
no it would be a relieve to find out if u should move on or just stay and try with the two of you loving each other....maybe he is also scared....but take that chance....its worth it
Girlbehindthecurtain · 31-35, F
Maybe i should just go in sometimes so he'll see me and all he might need is some time?
I mean they live together and she makes him think he is bad so he has to think and realize this situation suck.
If i'd just showed up and told him that he might just say no out of fear
wudifu · 46-50, M
give him complements and smile at him and stand closer to him more often asking questions or when he wants to talk to you

but i really think honesty and just throwing it in and telling him exactly how u feel will definitely be the best

scape some courage together and tell him everything that's on your mind and heart about him
Girlbehindthecurtain · 31-35, F
We don't work anymore so even if i go in he'll be busy (he is one of the bosses)
And i think after my text he won't want to chit-chat with me
Girlbehindthecurtain · 31-35, F
Like when he kept gushing over me to our boss and she later told me about it,winking at me..then i told he shouldn't do that infront of our boss- didn't want him to get into trouble- and he freaked out
wudifu · 46-50, M
All that i know is this guy likes you and stands up for you and even if he can just spend a minute with you to go to a party and just look at you and then has to go then he likes you.

My wife made the first move on me 20 yrs ago and we still together...its worth the chance

My wife was married in a abusive relationship and i took her out of it because i stood up for her and made her happy every day she was working for me too...

So she just said rhe one day she has a crush on me and then the rest was history
Girlbehindthecurtain · 31-35, F
There isn't a good timing during work so...
wudifu · 46-50, M
Yes i know
Girlbehindthecurtain · 31-35, F
So idk how that could even work