Is this a healthy thing for my relationship?

Helloo peeps! I'm a teen looking for relationship advice :))

I've been in a relationship for a couple of years but the way we got together was very...rough.
To make this short—we rushed into it. We were only getting to know each other when one thing led to another and I inadvertently confessed, and it ultimately led to where I am today.
My partner admitted he has gotten bored of our dates...of me tbh, as it was always the same thing; he would be the talker and I would try to be funny and hilariously fail.
He says he wants to learn something from me, like how he learned characteristics and skills and hobbies from other people in his life.
He wants something to happen between us that's actually fun basically.

So now to what this post is about.

It all started with me.
I told him what I think is our biggest problem: A lack of friendship chemistry. And he agreed with me. Now, he would be the problem solver of our (and my) issues, but he couldn't think of a solution, so I slowly came up with this suggestion: "What if we put aside the romance of our relationship?"
He told me it was interesting and that it sounds fun!
So that's what we did. But he took it differently from what I imaged.

We decided that our closest friends will play along with us and act as if we had never met. They will also be the ones who will introduce us to each other and stuff.

It's been a day since we've started this, and I already feel so hurt.
I saw him laughing and having fun with others, his friends. Note that I have...an anxious-attachment style and jealousy issues due to always being left out n etc.

Please tell me if this is ok or if this has been done before, I really want help.

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BobbySpeedy

It really sounds like you’re carrying a lot right now, and I’m glad you reached out. What you’re describing isn’t “wrong” or weird it’s two people trying to fix something they both feel is missing. But it also makes complete sense that this experiment is hurting you. You didn’t want to erase the relationship; you wanted to rebuild the friendship inside it. Those are very different things.

Seeing him laughing with others while you’re pretending to be strangers would sting for anyone, especially if you already struggle with feeling left out. That doesn’t mean you’re overreacting it means the situation isn’t giving you the emotional safety you need.

The idea you came up with wasn’t bad. Wanting to strengthen the friendship part of your relationship is actually really healthy. But the way it’s being acted out seems to be pushing you further away instead of bringing you closer. You’re not learning new things about each other you’re watching him enjoy other people while you feel invisible.

You deserve to feel included, valued, and secure, even during a “reset.”

It might help to talk to him honestly about how this first day made you feel. Not in a blaming way, but in a “I didn’t expect this to hurt as much as it does, and I need us to adjust the plan” kind of way. You’re allowed to say that the current version of this experiment isn’t working for you.

And for what it’s worth friendship chemistry isn’t something you manufacture by pretending you’ve never met. It’s something you build slowly by doing new things together, sharing experiences, and letting yourselves be curious about each other again.

You’re not wrong for wanting help. You’re not wrong for feeling hurt. And you’re definitely not alone in trying to figure out how to make a relationship feel alive again.

If you want, I can help you think through what to say to him or how to reshape this idea into something that actually feels good for both of you. If you would like to carry on this conversation, please do so in a private message to me. 😉

Minm1ntheOrca · 13-15, F

@BobbySpeedy Hii Thank you so so much for the reply
But did u use generative AI to write this ://?

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