How do you handle double standards in a relationship?

Never have! I've heard that "what's good for the goose is good for the gander". It didn't make sense to me for decades! Never been entitled to the same rights as the true folk, the cool kids, the people who count. Seeming like I might have equality never failed to bring instant regrets!. Someone's wife! Someone's sister! A friend! How dare I be compare my tiny self to whole people? Violence follows!