My wife cheated on me about 15 months into our marriage. After a miscarriage. Overseas. 56 years ago. We did something most couples don't do. We stayed together. Took about 30 years to rebuild trust. This Dec will be 58 years of marriage. I did the right thing.

When I first met my ex wife I was already in the military . When we were getting serious , I told her that the military was my career . She affirmed that it wouldn’t be a problem . We got married while the ship I was stationed on was in dry dock . Everything was fine . After , we left dry dock and began sea trials , she started complaining that I was hardly home . After one deployment , my next door neighbor stopped me one day and told me that he saw a few guys come over after we began the deployment . I brushed it off and didn’t think much about it . We were scheduled to deploy for 3 weeks . Fortunately , we came back 3 days earlier . As i unlocked the door to the apartment , I heard a noise coming from the bedroom and I slowly peeked in and saw them in bed together . I snuck out and left . Went to a convience store , I called her on a pay phone and told her I’d be home in a little bit . I came back home and walked in as they were both walking out of bedroom . We worked on it for a few years but , it fell apart after she got pregnant by another lover . It was 4 years after the initial affair .

I was cheated on and lied to constantly and I’ve been single since my divorce, I wasn’t ready to get into another relationship and wanted to heal myself, maybe I’m ready now, I’ll only know if I allow myself to let anyone in again.

Your spouse cheated on you in a despicable act.

Now you are allowing the act to control your life.

You are telling yourself you have never been able AND will never recover from that.

I think you should start telling yourself that it happened, it hurt unbelievably, but it will not take my life from me!! I have the capacity to love and be loved.

Therapy could help.

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