How do I handle the situation? My boyfriend and I have been dating for 5 years. We have been...

Dealing with a situation where your boyfriends ex is still causing disturbances can be challenging, but it's important to handle it in a calm and rational manner. Here are some steps you can consider taking:

Communicate with your boyfriend: Talk to your boyfriend about how he feels about the situation and what he would like to do about it. Make sure to listen to his concerns and feelings before taking any action.

Set boundaries: Encourage your boyfriend to set clear boundaries with his ex. This may involve blocking her on social media, changing his phone number, or having a direct conversation with her about respecting his space.

Document the disturbances: Keep a record of any disturbing behavior from the ex, such as harassing messages or unwanted contact. This documentation may be useful if legal action becomes necessary.

Consider legal options: If the disturbances escalate or become threatening, it may be necessary to involve law enforcement.
Encourage your boyfriend to file a police report if he feels unsafe.

Support your boyfriend: Offer emotional support to your boyfriend during this difficult time. Let him know that you are there for him and that you will help him navigate the situation.

Seek professional help: If the situation becomes too overwhelming, consider seeking the help of a therapist or counselor to help both of you cope with the stress and anxiety caused by the disturbances.

Remember that every situation is unique, and it's important to handle it with care and sensitivity. Encourage open communication with your boyfriend work together to find a solution that works best for both of you.

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Reflection2 · M

His parents should have enough depth to understand her agenda, which you perfectly spotted and I totally agree. If I were in their place, I would have either changed the subject and never provided her that luxury of space. Or if I felt it being pushed, I would have put a full stop to it.

I am not saying that arw bad people but it appears they are very simple people who can't sense others intentions and how it might effecting some people around. In this case you.

What's the solution? A straight talk about how her presence is making you insecured ( don't be afraid to admit it). If he care about you and he will rectify the things around, you both

OlderSometimesWiser · F

From your profile I can see that this has been going on for years. Don’t know what there is for you to handle. Is it that you want your boyfriend to do something?

Picklebobble2 · 56-60, M

She must know it's inappropriate.
So should your boyfriend.

It's easy to say 'be the bigger woman and walk away' but even i think she has an ulterior motive behind this.

Perhaps the answer is to use your phone and photograph her every time she 'magically' appears beside your boyfriend.

If nothing else you have evidence of the frequency this happens so you can shove it under your short sighted boyfriend's nose.

Or maybe when she shows up with her boyfriend,
maybe let them chat but drag him to one side, get all cosy and watch her response.

eMortal · M

This will never stop. She'll always be around. She is a family friend at this point!
You have 2 choices, either you leave or you start seeing her as just a family friend.
Don't waist your energy trying to fix things. It's just gonna make you more obsessed with the situation.

being · 36-40, F

Let it go, really. Use this energy, transcend this momentum into something different ❤️
I know it's not easy.
But it's a situation that, dwelling into it is only going to give power to her and take it from your relationship.
Take care of yourself. Pamper yourself. Go get a massage or something. Tell yourself how you matter and the rest can go fak off...:)

It's lovely that you have this relationship, nurture it..

BOREDAFPA · 41-45, M

She sounds very manipulative and egotistical. Probably still can't stand the fact she got dumped as a consequence of doing something wrong. If she has any legitimate feelings about the topic the most she could have done was just apologize and try to move on but she cannot. Her poor bruised ego won't let her just move on so others can live and.be happy without her

robertsnj · 56-60, M

are you two looking to get married? bought a house together but not talked about marriage or getting married?

also are you afraid he is still interested in her? If he isnt' not much she can really do to hurt your relationship --other than being annoying. In a small way understand she is probably in pain --it hurts to lose someone you are into.

Braveheart · M

Be brave your partner's ex is unnecessary noise. Suspect she drives him mad sticking her nose in. If your in laws have an ounce of common sense they should back off. In a couple of years time this other woman will grow up hopefully.

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