Would u say men overestimate attention So if u talk to them u love them etc…

Would u say men overestimate attention

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Kodel · 26-30, M

I'd say men never truly understand intention. It's rarely communicated directly. Most men get minimal attention from women without a lot of work so if we get attention from a woman we haven't invested a lot of effort in, she will stand out. Naturally, in these circumstances, we can start to develop interest because someone has made the dynamic easier. That's a fundamental desire for a lot of men in relationships; someone who is willing to put in the work to SHOW him that she cares. Men rarely receive this kind of attention if they aren't in a relationship.
In summary, if you talk to men, they will at least think you care enough to illicit interaction with them. If you SHOW that you care about them as a person, that can be enough for a man to say "I'd love to date someone like that," because most women don't. We don't think women love us, we just hope that they might grow to love us if they experience enough of our character.

zonavar68 · 56-60, M

@Kodel Women automatically get attention from other women and it's accepted as 'normal' because f/f relationships are far more mainstreamed than m/m ones. Most women I attempt to communicate with are not interested because my life is structured around part-time work and part-time parenting of my daughter.

Kodel · 26-30, M

@zonavar68 I'm not sure if you meant to say that f/f relationships are far more mainstreamed than m/m or m/f.
Overall, I'd say that females are inherently more social creatures. Sure, men can be extroverts or just enjoy people but a lot of men enjoy their alone time.
Fundamentally, I'd just say women get more attention as well. It comes from both sides. Women like being around other women and men like being around women. Women like being around a very few particular men and don't care for the vast majority of men. It sounds harsh but it is the truth. I do understand part of the reasoning with the whole, "You don't know who the psychos are" mentality. A lot of them do also hide behind personas that have fooled women in the past.
There definitely needs to be some work done to bridge the divide between men and women. Men don't want constant rejection or invalidation so we've stopped pursuing as much. Women have had some harsh experiences with some horrible men and as a result, a lot of the good ones don't get the chance to shine.