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PinkMoon · 26-30, F
@Authoritarian So you punish yourself by keeping in touch with a woman that left you? Instead of moving on you're wasting this poor new girl's time because clearly you just want to be with your toxic ex. Can you imagine if the new woman called you just so her ex could hear your voice? Or if she was flirting with an ex? Are you using her to make the toxic ex jealous? Because if so mission accomplished,just let the poor woman go.
You're currently behaving in extremely toxic,self destructive and anti social ways. You lose em how you got em buddy,she cheated with you,cheated on you and then left you,just like she left her ex. You're not special to her,she just loves lording the power she has over you,the power you so freely give her.
You're a young man with a career and a bright future ahead of him. You have what it takes to be in a healthy relationship free of unnecessary drama. A relationship where you won't be manipulated,berated and cheated on. You did a bad thing by dating someone in a relationship but you're not a bad person,you're just a fool. You're the worst kind of fool,the wise fool. Wise enough to know better but too foolish to do better.
Stop using the strong feelings she brings out in you as an excuse to backslide. She's a dud man,a manipulative dud with an ego so large she can't stand the thought of an ex moving on. She doesn't love you or her used to be ex and now fiancé,she only loves herself.
Cut her off,block her off of everything and purge yourself of this season of your life and embrace a new one. One where you assert healthy boundaries,one where you make decisions to help your future self,not harm him by compounding trauma after trauma for him to have to process.
You're currently behaving in extremely toxic,self destructive and anti social ways. You lose em how you got em buddy,she cheated with you,cheated on you and then left you,just like she left her ex. You're not special to her,she just loves lording the power she has over you,the power you so freely give her.
You're a young man with a career and a bright future ahead of him. You have what it takes to be in a healthy relationship free of unnecessary drama. A relationship where you won't be manipulated,berated and cheated on. You did a bad thing by dating someone in a relationship but you're not a bad person,you're just a fool. You're the worst kind of fool,the wise fool. Wise enough to know better but too foolish to do better.
Stop using the strong feelings she brings out in you as an excuse to backslide. She's a dud man,a manipulative dud with an ego so large she can't stand the thought of an ex moving on. She doesn't love you or her used to be ex and now fiancé,she only loves herself.
Cut her off,block her off of everything and purge yourself of this season of your life and embrace a new one. One where you assert healthy boundaries,one where you make decisions to help your future self,not harm him by compounding trauma after trauma for him to have to process.
riseofthemachine · 41-45, M
Learn from the situation or else you’ll walk into another relationship the same . You’ll have fierce trust issues with women . A 4-5 month relationship is very short to understand . A very short time . Even 4-5 years is very short in a relationship.
What blew your mind and I can relate is that she said forever .
Also I can relate even knowing the relationship was broken you were trying but her love back with presents.
Also do me a favour , if your with someone cut all ties with opposite relationships, like contact with ex’s and going out with someone , no wonder the relationship broke down if she was in contact with her ex.
Another one I learned and you might not have much control over it , never introduce girlfriend to other fella friends cause they’d could end up chasing her .
That’s where pain comes in then and especially if she goes off with one of them . Make your world as small as possible with her and you’ll have a big relationship with her then .
Leave her go out and leave her do what she wants to do and if you are ment to be with her and together you’ll know it .
I was with a woman for 4 years . I met her when she was 19 and I was 25 and 6 years gap so I had to leave her live her life cause she was young and so was I at that age . I took me a trip to a pysche ward 3 times in the one year for a 6 weeks stretch being in there to understand we were both young at that age and as what you said she wanted to be with you forever . That’s the bone crusher my friend .
Give time time and you won’t suffer that much no more and don’t jump into another one straight away cause as what I said the chances it could happen again can be very strong.
I’m 42 now and I’m single 14 years and I’m ok most of the time but I’m saying you have to be single , just watch jumping into another one straight way .
Eventually when your older you’ll look back at the good times instead of seeing the bad times cause people normally look back at the bad times to play the victim.
What blew your mind and I can relate is that she said forever .
Also I can relate even knowing the relationship was broken you were trying but her love back with presents.
Also do me a favour , if your with someone cut all ties with opposite relationships, like contact with ex’s and going out with someone , no wonder the relationship broke down if she was in contact with her ex.
Another one I learned and you might not have much control over it , never introduce girlfriend to other fella friends cause they’d could end up chasing her .
That’s where pain comes in then and especially if she goes off with one of them . Make your world as small as possible with her and you’ll have a big relationship with her then .
Leave her go out and leave her do what she wants to do and if you are ment to be with her and together you’ll know it .
I was with a woman for 4 years . I met her when she was 19 and I was 25 and 6 years gap so I had to leave her live her life cause she was young and so was I at that age . I took me a trip to a pysche ward 3 times in the one year for a 6 weeks stretch being in there to understand we were both young at that age and as what you said she wanted to be with you forever . That’s the bone crusher my friend .
Give time time and you won’t suffer that much no more and don’t jump into another one straight away cause as what I said the chances it could happen again can be very strong.
I’m 42 now and I’m single 14 years and I’m ok most of the time but I’m saying you have to be single , just watch jumping into another one straight way .
Eventually when your older you’ll look back at the good times instead of seeing the bad times cause people normally look back at the bad times to play the victim.
You shouldn't be engaging in workplace romances, either.
You need to lose the ex... you're just an option to her - and she's making it clear to you that she won't let you move on while she's still in the picture. So, your choice is to carry on waiting for a few breadcrumbs from her from time to time or lose her and start looking for a proper relationship.
You need to lose the ex... you're just an option to her - and she's making it clear to you that she won't let you move on while she's still in the picture. So, your choice is to carry on waiting for a few breadcrumbs from her from time to time or lose her and start looking for a proper relationship.
saintsong · 41-45, F
Sometimes you just have to cut ties, it will sting for a while, you'll want her back but you must discipline yourself it is a toxic and she is selfish and wants to dominate her boyfriend and you as well... if she loved you she would love those whom you loved and be happy for your new relationship, as it is she is jealous/toxic I don't know you decide...do you like this new woman if so you would protect her...Sometimes God closes a door and opens a window!
littlepuppywantanewlife · 31-35, M
She can't decide whom you should go out with. She is ex and doesn't have any rights to tell you what to do. If she wanted you she would been with you. Go tell her that.
stay away from crazy women. your life will be better for it.
PinkMoon · 26-30, F
Why do you hate yourself?
Authoritarian · 22-25, M
@PinkMoon I might be a bad person.
SW-User
Cutting toxic people off is necessary to move on
Zonuss · 41-45, M
People who are so quick to play the [b]victim[/b] often victimize others. Manipulation can be a defense mechanism for the weak. Trauma bonding relationships usually end us how it started. In trauma. Do yourself a favor. Stay away from dramatic people. You'll enjoy life more when you do. 🙂