I’m feeling something... is it jealousy?

My boyfriend and I were hosting a party with a few close friends and we were all having such a good and fun time. Everyone invited was all couples and no one is single. At a point of the night my boyfriend said to his guy friend “let’s go to the bar soon and hangout, I always have so much fun with you, love you bro.” After he said that I felt some type of way, I’m not sure if it’s jealous or something else and that’s what I’d like help figuring out. At that moment I felt alone and as if I had lost connection with my boyfriend or something. Maybe I felt left out thinking to myself why should those two just go out and have fun, I wanna have fun too I thought in my mind, we could all go out together again because it was fun. I get they may want their alone time together too though but why did I get that feeling. It kinda upset me. What is that feeling? Is it jealousy, anxiety, feeling left out, disconnected? What’s the word for what I’m feeling and why did I feel it?

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WhateverWorks · 36-40

Sounds like jeslousy, but the foot of the jealousy all the other things you described about anxiousness and feeling insecure etc.

Not going to BS you.. this thing you noticed about yourself is important to work on in order to have healthy relationships with people. It’s important that everyone have connections and a broader support system than just their boyfriend/girlfriend etc. even when you’re married it’s important to have a bigger support system than just your spouse.

Fifidog · 26-30, F

@WhateverWorks that’s for sure! So now that I noticed this about me what can I do about it? Someone has told me try therapy before but I find it hard to open up to a therapist. It’s something I need to work on but I don’t know where to begin. It bothers me when I get that feeling because it makes me anxious and then I feel alone.

WhateverWorks · 36-40

Some of what you’ve described sounds like it would be good for you to go to a counselor who specializes in something called attachment theory specifically

Mainly though it’s just important to develop your own support system, goals, things going on for yourself so that way you’re not hyper focused on your partner and whenever they have something else going on it activates your anxiety because then suddenly you become aware of all the things you don’t have going on for yourself.
@Fifidog

Fifidog · 26-30, F

@WhateverWorks that’s a good point I should focus on myself more. It would probably be a good idea to see a counselor for attachment. Thank you for your help. I really appreciate you taking the time to give me your advice. I have goals and lots of things going for me but I often get upset because the only other close reliable people I have in my life is my parents. No close friends who I can just pop over their house to say a quick hello, which bothers me.

morrgin · F

Bromance?

Fifidog · 26-30, F

@morrgin why do people have bromances? So annoying

jackrabbit10 · M

if his friend had a companion you should have hit on her,,

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