Letters written to my crush, show them or not show them?

I've been writing letters to my crush for the past year and a half since I last saw her. Even though we still talk on occasion and she's married. I miss her and I find the letters almost more therapeutic than the songs I write and play about her. I've been debating sending them as of late. Or at least making their existence known. It started as an AA exercise. But it's evolved into my own thing and I've come to enjoy it now.
I've probably written about 2-3 dozen of them by now, 60 pages. Sometimes wonder if they'd freak her out to know I've been thinking of her often since we last saw each other in person or if it'd be somewhat endearing.
In my defense before you think me terrible for feeling this way and writing these about a married friend, she's a very sweet and understanding person and the letters make it clear that despite feeling this way, I don't expect anything from it besides just being able to be completely honest with the person I value the most in my life. And, I mean, just the way she entered my life and how kind and nice she is to me all the time, I think I'm allowed those feelings towards her and, hell, I'm sure she even suspects me having somewhat of a crush to some extent.