Can You Be Happy by Yourself?

When you are happy within yourself, you begin to see relationships as an addition to your life rather than a necessity for your survival.

You enjoy spending time with friends and partners, but you do not lose your identity in them because your sense of satisfaction is rooted within.

As a result, you can set healthy boundaries more easily and experience less anxiety, fewer heartbreaks, and less need for external validation.

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lucasll · 18-21, M

I’ve been single for a while. I definitely view relations like an addition like you stated. I wouldn’t mind a GF right now of course, but I’m not feeling sad or lonely due to the lack of one.

Renkon · M

@lucasllI have to warn you, my friend… once you’re in a relationship, you might sometimes feel like you can’t breathe without them, especially during the first two times. Just giving you a heads up.

lucasll · 18-21, M

@Renkon I’ve had girlfriends before, I haven’t been single my whole life.

Renkon · M

@lucasll That's good.

Natalie15 · F

Interesting thought.

I think the nugget of truth in there is that when you are involved with someone, you begin to see them as essential. Like when you break up it wrenches your heart. Whereas, before you were in the relationship, you were somehow just fine without them.

Setting boundaries and not getting heartbroken is nice and all. But heartbreak can also be a great teacher.

As the poet Gibran writes: "Even as love crowns you, so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth, so is he for your pruning. Even as he ascends to your heights and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun, so too shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth."

Renkon · M

@Natalie15 Oh…I like Gibran....a prophetic poet.
Even in relationships, I have seen people who are content within themselves. It may not be common or easy, for that matter. But if you can get there, life feels a lot different.

Gibbon · 70-79, M

There's a difference in being happy and content. Being alone now I have learned to be content with myself. Who I lost cannot be replaced. I have accepted that but still grieve.

ChampagneOnIce · 51-55, F

Only child who had a corporate job that required a lot of solo travel. I’ve been comfortable in my own company for a long time, for better or worse when it comes to connecting.

Renkon · M

@ChampagneOnIce ....… It gives you a gentle edge as you wade through life..

Iwillwait · M

Yes

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