Safe in the Torture

I bolt awake,
throat splitting—
a scream almost free,
still burning in my chest.

Nightmare claws drag me
out of sleep,
sweat freezing my skin
like chains I can’t tear off.

Alone isn’t safety.
Walls crush in,
air too thin,
silence too loud.

So I run—
to the only place
the world can’t follow,
where water hammers harder
than my heart,
where sobs rip loose,
finally allowed to exist.

Tears vanish in the flood.
The shower keeps my secret.
And I break,
shaking,
alive,
but only just.