Yeah I'm not a nice guy (TM)

It's just this monkey when he's in love can't stand to see them blue.

(way of phrasing inspired by sophie b hawkins- damn I wish I was your lover)
But especially black and blue, even worse.
I'm not nice to women because I'm hoping to get laid.
I'm kind because I practically live to make them smile.
and it breaks my heart to see them suffer. and because being an ass and abusive would traumatize me

getting laid would be nice, but it's aside from the point.