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Any Texans here? Can you ID this plant?

A friend brought this to me from a Texas beach...someone had kicked it out of the sand so she brought this "stray" to me...on a plane and 2 Uber rides. She really bonded with this thing!!!
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It's a Triffid....
Fernie · F
omg it IS!!!!😱 [image deleted]
@Fernie Noooooo! 😲


Read the book.... I know what happens next.. 🤪
Fernie · F
@Majorlatency I don't wanna know! Don't tell!
@Fernie Well it appears you morph into some kind of legume! This is a critical phase so don't go too close to any all you can eat salad bars, you may end up on the menu... If you avoid the salad bars you eventually evolve into a man eating plant with an insatiable desire to lick scantily clad women.. (See attached picture)..

Fernie · F
@MajorlatencySo, it's male...figures. I'll tell you though...I looked at it with a big magnifying glass and it is one sinister looking plant. The end of each of those "branches" is an evil looking face..some have horns.
@Fernie oh my god under closer inveztigation it is one of Satan's disciples..

You need to exercise it.. Ive seen the movie.. call a priest and start doing jumping Jacks and push-ups to ward off evil spirits. .
Fernie · F
@Majorlatency No priest, no push ups...a Bic lighter and a can of lighter fluid should do the trick
@Fernie do it wearing a push up bra.. it's kind of close to the exercising ritual requirements. .

Feel free to send me photographs. I will perform my own secret ritual to oust the demons... it's a bit personal......
Fernie · F
@Majorlatency I wondered how long it would take for you to go there...longer than I expected!
@Fernie I know I disappoint myself... I've said three Hail Mary's... So let's change the subject.. Do you like puppies?