There's always hope if you don't give up. Autistic people I know are good people for the most part, I mean everyone has problems in there lifes, as far as being a messed up kid, you did have was in front of that. I take it your not messed up anymore. Trash job I can relate to that, every job I had I considered trash jobs but it was a job and helped pay the bills. I live in the United States but know some people from the UK, what's wrong with being from the UK? Anyways just don't give up on finding your soul mate there out there probably saying the same thing