I Am In Love With Someone I Can't Have
And its not the cushy nice feeling. Its screwing me up in ways I have never thought was possible. I hardly eat or sleep. And when I go to bed, there is this block in my chest, that wont let me cry or even breathe. I dont know how to move past this. Nothing like this has ever happened to me before. I was in a relationship for three years, and when I broke up, i had bad time, but I came to terms with it.
This new thing, its killing me inside. I like the guy, he is ignoring me. From weeks. He is getting married. He would talk and then stop. I wish for a closure I dont get, answers I dont get. He blocked me from everywhere (only cz I almost harassed him). All the promises broken. I wonder, what is it about him? We werent even in a relationship. I have never liked somebody like him either. He doesnt have one quality from the list of stuff I always look for in a guy. Not a thing. still I am head over heels, and obsessed. Just cz I cant have him? I dont know. I cant handle most of these feelings and they are playing a major setback in my life. I have a lot of stuff that needs to be done and are more important. But I just cant concentrate. I just want these feelings to go away. I have not only lost somebody I like, but I lost him as a friend too. and thats hurting me even more.
This new thing, its killing me inside. I like the guy, he is ignoring me. From weeks. He is getting married. He would talk and then stop. I wish for a closure I dont get, answers I dont get. He blocked me from everywhere (only cz I almost harassed him). All the promises broken. I wonder, what is it about him? We werent even in a relationship. I have never liked somebody like him either. He doesnt have one quality from the list of stuff I always look for in a guy. Not a thing. still I am head over heels, and obsessed. Just cz I cant have him? I dont know. I cant handle most of these feelings and they are playing a major setback in my life. I have a lot of stuff that needs to be done and are more important. But I just cant concentrate. I just want these feelings to go away. I have not only lost somebody I like, but I lost him as a friend too. and thats hurting me even more.
31-35, F
